Like i care.

2012-01-24T01:33:00.001+08:00

I know I know I know!

This is not 'tomorrow' like what I've promised :p Its just that, I was a bit worn out most of the days.

A week before my flight back to JB, I was a bit busy with some errands back in hometown@Keningau. I stayed there for a couple of days, then drive back to KK to get few things then drove back to Keningau the next day then wait for a couple of days before driving back to KK for cousin's wedding (which deserve a special entry on that).

I was exhausted running here and there but nothing beats all the satisfaction when errr.......... Well, Alhamdulillah :)

Then I only had two days before the scheduled flight so I really need to sort everything out, make sure I didn't leave anything behind, and printed out all the necessities: thank you tags etc.

Back in JB, I had few orders to do before weekend together with nephew's birthday party cakes! And cupcakes! And cookies!

And did you know I cannot stand too long, barefooted? Oh my god, its killing me! I remember there was this one time when I had a massive order then I had to stand for hours for few days, at the end of the day, I had some ruptured capillaries on my soles.

But, Obe was being nice, he always rub and massage my feet when I stand too long :) *bats eyelashes* He was sweet enough after the party, he massaged both of my foot until I dozed off a bit.

But whenever he asked me to, I always had excuses on my head.

"Malas!"
"Penat"
"Ngantuk"
"Ala you tawu I tak suka massage orang kan?"

The thing is, I don't have the energy to massage a guy! Oh c'mon, this nice, small, delicate hands?

And only few days left for the engagement! I started to get panic a bit but no, no no, you can control this Shaleen! Fuh!

The fitting is tomorrow, hopefully I didn't gain any weight which I don't think I did not *sigh* Why can't we stay slim all the time?

And anyway, I have a good news to share but I am not so sure if I am ready yet to tell you guys. Just wait love!

Bye!

2012-01-19T01:35:00.001+08:00

Miss me much?

See you tomorrow!

My feet hurts! And I also have dark circles now:(

Are you a photographer?

2012-01-11T21:44:00.003+08:00

No, this is not me panicking.

But, I just need some help.

If you do know any good photographer, preferably based in JB, with shoot and burn package less than RM500, got the right equipment to shoot a night event, do let me know!

Because our photographer for the engagement just bails out of us!

Gosh.

No I am not panicking.

The tales about RING(s)!

2012-01-10T22:36:00.004+08:00

I know my engagement is in less than 4 weeks, not that I wanna jinx it but 4 years ago, you must be surprised when I said I have settled for my dream engagement ring!

And I thought by posting my dream engagement ring back then in my blog, I can indirectly inform Obe what ring he should buy, just in case, you know, as he reads my blog. (Oh hi dear! So this is the ring that you should buy for me in the first place!)

Its Cartier, Entrelaces collection!

I know its too simple, and odd? But, knowing me well, I always go for something that is unique.

But too bad. This is not my engagement ring. Too bad I didn't post about the ring years ago. Too bad the picture has rotten together with old laptop at errrr, where is it again? Too bad Obe didn't know what ring until now.

But it is not too bad, because, just wait for our engagement ring soon! Hahaha. Will review it later, of course after the engagement along with some justifications(?). Ok too much journals.

Other than the Entrelaces collection, Trinity De Cartier collection has gotten my attention too! I mean, if you could get 3 rings in one time (and its Cartier), can you just say no?

I remember Mom had the same wedding ring too. But I don't think its Cartier. Heh Mummy? Hahaha. But when I asked her, she said she lost it along with some shampoo and shower gel and water. Yes, when she had a shower.

And no, this is not a post to tell Obe on what ring he should buy for me for our wedding as we decided to have bracelet instead.

Bye Cartier :(

2012-01-08T00:24:00.002+08:00

If everything is as simple as ABC,

then what's left for us to ponder and start praying for His forgiveness?

I hope I can be that strong to get through this.

When will it stop?

2012-01-04T23:21:00.003+08:00

I think I am that type of people who tend to hurt myself. And it scares the hell out of me! And it is all because of my extreme fear to small crawling things.

Story 1:

I was helping my mom gardening one day, then when I was pulling weeds out of the pot, I mistakenly thought this one green, fine fur thing as a weed. A millimeter closer, I realized it was a caterpillar! I screamed! I ran! I cried! And I couldn't stop hitting my hand so hard until 30 secs later I stopped. Because my hand was hurt, and red. It was so painful I had to rub some ointment that night.

Story 2:

Our kitchen's sink drainage system back in our home in JB connected to the drains outside directly. I was cleaning up the dishes one night. I took the sponge and continue scrubbing the dishes when suddenly I felt like something, something with many legs, crawling on my hand. I had a closer look at it and saw a baby centipede!! I kept on hitting my hand on the sink until it fell and I had bruises on my hand later. Luckily I don't have any knife with me, imagine what would happen?

Realized that I tend to hurt myself with this tiny creature, I took a step ahead.

One day Afi was pulling a prank on me. He did some gardening and I think he found something when he kept on repeating calling out my name. I purposely didn't answer it. Annoyed, he walked into the house, and the minute he entered I shut my eyes tightly. He put something on my lap, I know it were worms. I just sat stiffly, eyes closed and continue cursing him.

Mom came and tell my brother to stop playing around. Guess who kena marah?

ME!!

"Ish... Tu cacing je pun. Buat apa nak takut??"

Tak takut. Geli lah mommy!!!

2012-01-03T00:21:00.001+08:00

Effort baru 1% T_T

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Two years.

2012-01-02T22:57:00.004+08:00

Today, it has been two years since you were gone. But not each minute, each second, I stop thinking about you..

Each time when the new year is approaching, I just couldn't accept the fact another year will pass by, another year without you by our side.

It hurts so much but I know Allah has a better plan for me, you and all of us, InsyaAllah.

I seriously, deeply, misses you Daddy :(

Al-Fatihah.

ps: A quick editing video.

Typical?

2011-12-28T23:23:00.000+08:00

Have you ever heard of '30 minit Bersama Ustaz Don'? Or maybe I am the last one to know about him?

Well, I think I am one of the typical Muslims, who much prefer Star World, AXN or MTV over some educational channels (sans Discovery, National Geographic and among it). A Muslim educational channel.

One day I was bored to death, changing from one channel to another until I stumbled upon this one talk by Dr. Masitah Ibrahim at Astro Prima. I was surprised at how you can learn so many things in 30 minutes, reflecting ourselves on how to be a better Muslim. And since then I sort of hooked on this channels; Prima, AlHijrah and TV9.

The topic was 'Haid'. Hurm.... Interesting!

Remember during high school bila ada spot check, what we did when we were caught having long nails? "Saya period!". Well, that's a myth! You can your nails or your hair when you were having your menses. I came to know this few years back so what I did was after I cut it, I will throw it away on ground or bury it. But actually, you don't have to do that. So, cut your nails girls!
"You must wash your pad!". Well, that is more of a culture. You really don't have to scrub it sampai jadi putih bersih. Syhhhh I've known some yang buat. To be frank, I don't wash my pad. Because if you wash it, it will be soggy, then air menjejes2, then you have to perah, then you fold it, then you have to make sure it doesn't drip all the way to tong sampah, then you have to scrub your hand pulak.
Cannot enter masjid. There were few hadiths actually discussing on this. But what Dr. Masitah shared was, as long as it doesn't drip during your presence in the mosque then ok. Sedangkan Rasullah (S.A.W.) asked someone to take something in the mosque even when she was having her menses. You must also know some of the hadith said you can't enter a mosque when you were having your menses, because, you have to know that PAD belum wujud at that time! All they used was cloth being folded on their panties. Now with all the technology, pad and tampon, and as long as you're not heavily bleeding, then it should be ok.
Al-Quran. Ok obviously you cannot read or touch it BUT under few circumstances, you can. Example, dalam keadaan darurat when you have to save the Quran. Two, when parts of the Quran become your daily zikr, Surah Al-Mulk, Ayatul Qursi.

Now as for Uztaz Don, the first time I watched his show was for Muhasabah Diri. I hate him to the max that time. I mean, he looked like a fake Ustaz (Astaghfirullah!). Then the next day, when I don't have other channel to watch, I tune to AlHijrah and watched his show. Masya Allah, I even BBMed Obe telling how funny and best his show was! And since then I keep on watching his show, on YouTube. Seriously, you will learn so much from his show, InsyaAllah. From self-reflection to tajwid to akidah and ibadah!

And that makes me not the typical Muslim anymore? Haha. Nah kidding. I just don't watch 90120 anymore but I still loves ANTM!

2011-12-26T22:52:00.001+08:00

Can I still keep on dreaming of my dream wedding?

*sigh*

Aint this cute?

2011-12-24T20:52:00.001+08:00

Obe: Nape mummy I call tak angkat? Semalam pun tak angkat :(
Shaleen: Mummy I? You call what time?
Obe: Yup. Just now..

*try to call mom, no answer*

Shaleen: I call mummy pun tak angkat. Tak dengar kot. Nape?
Obe: Saje nak call rindu.. Semalam I call pun mummy tak angkat.
Shaleen: Eh??
Obe: Biasa mummy call balik..
Shaleen: You rindu mummy i? Hehehehe.
Obe: Haha. Lame tak dengar suara dia. Die pun lama tak datang meeting.
Shaleen: Hehe chomel lah you! I call rumah. Mummy keluar ada dinner.
Obe: Haha.. I memang comel pon..

*puke*

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So how does it started?

2011-12-20T23:32:00.003+08:00

If you are an avid reader of my blog (and read most of entries that I have deleted :p) or maybe you just plainly know me well, be it from schools or colleges, you must have known my passion towards dancing right?

But how does it all started?

Primary 3.

My first performance as a flower for a school play.

With leaves made from polystyrene on both of my hands and flower petals from manila card tied at the back of my face, I was the flower, kneeling on the flower for the whole duration, swaying from left to right.

And it didn't stop there.

Primary 4. Primary 5. Primary 6. And up until secondary school!

When I was in form 1, I followed my sister's footstep, joined the same school and enrolled in their dance club together with her. And it was easy for me to be well known by others, by being adik Shasha or adik Shabana.

So yeah.

And from form 1 until form 5, I just couldn't stop dancing. Me and friends did performances around Johor, thanks to the strong collaboration between school and YWJ. We skipped classes, stayed back after schools, pergi area kedai India depan Kotaraya just to buy some pins, or hair clips, or donuts (rambut).

We DIY some of our costumes and had a lots of fun just being surrounded with friends!

I was the AJK every year until form 3. Became Naib Pengerusi the year after and Pengerusi during my final year.

Seriously, I didn't know if I could dance well. I always get intimidated by others; Sarah Syafiqa (Oh my sangat jeles selalu I don't know why!) and Belle (Hehehe yes you Belle!). But until one day, during our practice for Citrawarna Malaysia (was it in 2002?), we had to this movement, you know, macam kayuh sampan but you had to kneeling, one leg up, then kayuh. Haha susah explain. One of the pengajar commented on me and ask the others to follow my attitude! Oh my, I felt so overwhelmed! How one simple step but if you have the correct attitude, you can nail it.

I even had a major fight with my mom when she caught me cheating for staying back after school because I promised to stop dancing. It was the day when I had my Math trial exam for SPM. I just cried all the way during examination.

But it didn't stop me.

After some time, Mom realized that she had to supported me. That was my passion, and she did. She even helped covering me up from Dad, who thought I've stop dancing after high school.

During my matriculation year, I met with mostly new people in our dance troupe. And learned a different genre from high school. We did a lot of creative traditional dance in high school, but here, what I learned was mostly traditional dance.

And I just couldn't stop dancing.

When I git the offer to study in Kelantan, I was terrified. One. I'd never been there. Two, knowing that it is an Islamic state I just scared of not being able to dance.

Because I just couldn't stop dancing.

There were nothing much to compare between university and college/school because obviously there was a huge gap, from the level, exposure and opportunity. I mean, if they get even more chance to perform and has someone there to choreograph, surely they can be at the same level with my previous groups.

But I was just so happy to be there.

Because finally they managed to learned a lot of things, with me being around :) Nothing could explain what I've done here, and I won't get 'Cikgu' or 'Primadona USM' or 'Ratu Zapin' for nothing aite? Hehe.

And the best achievement ever, at least to me, I won Best Female Dancer in one of the IPTA competition! And I could sense my whole family were so proud of me!

And I was also the leader of our dance group back in university for most of the years.

After graduated, and after taking care of my sick (arwah) father back then, I took a major step in my life. I explored a whole new world for me. I worked as a full-time dancer in one of the most well known group in KL. I was the spotlight for many years and I also became the spotlight there, but not in a good way.

Surprisingly, the talent and experiences that I had was nothing for them. I was the worst dancer among them. I was nothing. And I just couldn't stand it. For the first time ever in my life, I did not enjoy dance like what I always did. And I was lucky, I managed to get away after 2 weeks working there.

But I did not regret at all working there. It was an experience for me. It opens my eyes, see things from a different angle, and learn few things.

When I became a lecturer, the whole college knew I can dance very well, and the news spread so fast!

And surprisingly, I did dance, once, with the students for a competition. And we won! It was the best performance ever in my life. Because it was a whole new experience to me, dancing with a bunch of 18 years old teenagers.

I still do love to dance. But at some time, you just have to stop. It is a major step for me, but until I find the right time and place, I will start to dance again. After all, I live to dance :) It is our culture (oh forgot to mention I can only do traditional dance :p) and I do hope I can pass it down to our kids, InsyaAllah.

Oh and I asked one of my friend one day:

Do you think I can dance?
Yes!
What type of dance? Paling boleh and paling tak boleh?
Paling boleh is pure traditional. Paling tak boleh is hip hop.

And I was well known with the smile on stage. I get a lot of compliments of the smile and eye contact on stage that just could make your heart melts. Haha. I don't know if its true but that was what people told me. Well, a lot of people actually! Hahaha.

Enjoy some of the videos :) And some that I treasured the most hilang :(

This was where I won the award.

Ok this one masa Obe first time ngurat! Haha. And you can hear from the start of the performance, there was a group of boys shouting my name!

This one masa still jadik lecturer. Cis gediknye aku! Hahaha.

Random pictures

2011-12-20T13:46:00.000+08:00

Lesson learnt.

2011-12-14T15:10:00.002+08:00

One thing I realized is that you really cannot depending on others. I know that sometime I do hoping that someone could make a decision for me, brushing off some weight on my chest, by having a second opinion.

Or maybe sometime I do hope someone could do some very simple things for me.

And now, lesson learnt, no matter what, being a woman or a man, single, married or divorced, poor or rich, you have to learn how to stand alone.

Because that is how your life is functioning.

Lesson learnt, and I am happy I realized it sooner than I think.

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2011-12-10T00:35:00.002+08:00

I don't realize that I rarely blog nowadays, or maybe I rarely tell what I am up to, or my whereabouts, you know, since I travel JB-KL-KK sometime until Kak Joan asked me since when I am back in KK when I met her to send some cookies sample today.

So yeah, this is a shout out.

I am back in KK!

Two more months to the engagement, which I shall be back maybe a week early?

The last few days in Semenanjung before I going back to KK were the most hectic one. I mean, we had our kursus kahwin, hantaran shopping, door gift shopping, some DIY things, ring hunting (ahhhh yes the best part!) all squeeze in a very tight schedule.

Ok. I'm done!

All I want you to know is I am in KK until end of Jan yaeyyyy!

Manja's Wedding

2011-12-06T04:21:00.004+08:00

Just killing some time waiting for Subuh after taking oats (yikes) for sahur.

Few pictures from my cousin, Manja's wedding. Bollywood theme bebeh! One strike off, next? Me (yikes!)!

ps: Anyway, I slept super early today! At 10pm! Not feeling so well so I decided to hit the sack a bit early.

Turning a new leaf, a new year.

2011-12-03T00:24:00.003+08:00

I don't know if you noticed anything, but I have deleted more than half of my entries here :) Entries that I am not proud of.

No, I don't want to delete my history. As much as I hate deleting all of it as if I was deleting my memories, I do think as a human, we need to change to be a better person. It can be as simple as that, for me.

And I do hope I won't stop here.

But please, please just let me do it step by step, slowly but eventually, I will be there :) Just wait.

Salam Maal Hijrah everyone! Although I am late.

Easy peasy?

2011-11-25T00:08:00.004+08:00

Three things you should know about me:

1. I forget things easily. Like easy peasy. I may not remember what happened yesterday. I may not remember what did we conversed just now. I kept on losing things (which Obe was so scared of) and then found in a few minute (no surprise, Obe cakap). Now I don't even remember my research's topic. Now, this is a big problem!

2. I do not hate kids, I just don't know what to do with them. What would you do?

3. Again, I forgot.

So maybe we'll end by two?

Update :)

2011-11-23T00:07:00.002+08:00

Did you know for the proposal ring, Obe bought one that is 3 1/2 size bigger than mine? Yes, freaking 3 1/2 size bigger! So I gave it back to him last week for alteration. Told him to make it 2 1/2 size smaller because I was scared the diamond might fall of because of different pressure holding it (like what they told me when I send it for alteration in KK).

Too bad, I just realized I couldn't wear a ring. Or maybe I am not used to it. I mean, I'd never wear a ring before and I know I have a very sensitive skin.

The first night I tried it on, my skin around it went red and itchy. Gosh! And it could easily came off too!

When I told Obe to just use that ring for the engagement (cheapskate huh), he doesn't want too. Malu orang dah nampak cincin and he wanted to buy a better one. But now I'm thinking of to just buy a ring for the engagement and not for the solemnization. I don't think I will wear rings on my fingers. I have problem *sigh*

Obe will take a day off this Friday as we really need to scout around for items for the engagement as this will be my last trip to Semenanjung until February.

Till then for the engagement preps ;)

I see red......... Danish!

2011-11-18T13:44:00.000+08:00

I just realized I haven't posted anything on Danish for quite some time now!

He's growing fast! Now at 10 months he's able to crawl and walk *cough* of course with a help. He hates me or maybe I just don't know how to entertain kids. Aih. But he loves my mom! Oh my sangat manja with his Grandma ok! One day, Seri left him with us, me and Mom. He didn't even like the idea of me cuddling him! Kids nowadays..

Anyways, he will always be apple of our eyes. Well at least until someone gives us another niece/nephew (and in a way torturing me!).

Here, some shots from last weekend when BIL was here. We went for a dinner at a chinese seafood restaurant near home.

Sorry. Bad lighting!

My collection of pretty girls sigh

2011-11-18T00:48:00.003+08:00

I send my sister's DSLR (well can I claim it as mine Kakak? Hehehehe) to service so I don't have it for few weeks until recently.

I was browsing the SD card through my laptop and I had pictures since Raya! Wahaha! And, some pictures from Obe's and Afi's trip to Sepang GP.

And half of the collection was filled with pretty & sexy girls T_T

Ok budak ni nampak innocent. Suwit mesti Obe suka (not!).

But really, what's with guys and pretty girls??

Even Afi was happy able to snap a picture with this lady. Fuh fuh tengok berpeluh abs Afi hahaha.

But oh wait! Wait wait wait until you see this picture.....

Amboi! Seronok ye bang??? *shaking head*

OMGucci!

2011-11-16T22:28:00.002+08:00

Oh my god!

I promised my supervisor to do a research further on my topic when I am back in JB, now 3 weeks after I totally forgot what she was talking about back then! Even looking at her notes she copied for me, I don't even remember a thing!

Oh my god!

She's so gonna kill me when I emailing her later!

Oh my god!

I am soooooooooooo panic!

Tu lah dah cakap ini bukan holiday, ini bukan study leave!

2011-11-09T02:45:00.001+08:00

I thought I will handle it badly tonight. Like what happened during the day. But Allah is Great. All you have to do is ask for it, InsyaAllah. Believe this is takdir and all happen for a reason.

Now tell me?

2011-11-08T23:19:00.005+08:00

Where to start?

I think in my life (so far) there were two deaths that affected me like, badly. One: Ronaldo (our cat) death. Two: when Dad passed away.

As you know the sudden viral outbreak that spread like dust in the wind has killed 3 adult cats and 7 kittens so far. We are doing our best up until now to stop the spread and to make sure the sick cats get better day by day.

Only one kitten survived from the 5th generation. The only one left.

I nursed her. Fed her every couple of hours. Cleaned her and that's including tadah her kencing once when she accidentally pee and also wiped her shit yang sometime boleh keluar macam air bau susu basi. I also let her slept on me most of the time since I read somewhere they need the body warmth and affection to survive. Mom also take turn taking care of her when I was away to eat/solat etc.

I brought her to my room every night to sleep. I covered her box with another blanket. Prepared hot packs all the time. I slept with number 1 speed fan only. I woke up at 2am sometime 3 and also at 5am. I was (very) sleepy sometime I dozed off while nursing her. Once, I was caught sleeping bersila with her on my groin. Seriously I don't remember bila aku angkat dia but I did fell asleep and had a dream!

Hence I shed a couple of kg!

Sometime I couldn't be bother to eat as all my attention was for her. My stomach growled all the time even when she was sleeping on my tummy. I dare not to go out more than 2 hours as I was worried what would happened if she was awake and I was not around. I became very alert with sounds nowadays. Takut dengar Lucelle mengiau terbangun.

Last two days, I noticed something was wrong. You couldn't really tell what but I know she's going to leave us. On hari raya aidiladha eve, I didn't sleep! Because I was worried sick something bad would happen. I was so scared of losing her. And I cried all night and kept on praying she will be ok.

The next day, she was better. Alhamdullilah.

But who knows? Allah has a better plan for us.

I took her to my room as usual. Let her sleep on my chest and I was awake slightly before 5am because she was screaming. Oh my, gugur jantung sekejap. I looked at her, which terjatuh tepi masa aku terbangun terkejut and I knew instantly. I ran downstairs to Mom's room and she held her until she died. It was 6.30am.

I went to sleep after we buried her and arise masa azan Zuhur. I must be pretty exhausted for the past week. Huhu.

Despite all of this, I always look the silver lining behind everything. I know I know Allah has a better plan so I just gobbled down everything eventhough it was hard.

Even Mom told me that she felt something was missing after Maghrib today.

Yeah, Lucelle did had a big impact on us.

(with chronological order, some of her picture from my phone)

This was taken the night before she died. Aihhh.

Be strong Shaleen!

2011-11-08T02:22:00.001+08:00

I lost weight.

If that wasn't enough, I fell asleep most of the time on the couch.

I don't even had the time to browse through the internet.

Happy Eidul Adha!

Ps: I need some sleep.

:)

2011-11-03T01:04:00.001+08:00

Every night kalau tak kena kencing sampai dua kali memang tak sah kan? Nasib kau chumel, Lucelle!

Wedding preps?

2011-11-01T13:50:00.002+08:00

Pffttt!

I know I told you that I don't know whether to blog on my wedding stuff or not, but hey, no harm at all if I share sikit sikit kan? Hehehe. Nah I'm just excited and boring at the same time. And to know that once I am back in Sabah I will be the usual nerdy, and has no time at all to think about the wedding, maybe I can do my revenge here?

Guess what? We have booked our official photographer already!! Hehehehe. Tunang pun belum tapi dah gelabah semacam eh? Even our caterer & canopies (as usual from mom's friend, Hj. Taha) pun dah confirm. Ala it was easy to work with them. They'd catered almost all of our family's events including kenduri. So with them, tak payah cakap banyak, semua ok aje. As for the pelamin, decorations and all, InsyaAllah, we'll book from this one rising bridal from JB. Met them last weekend and it went well! The owner was friendly, helpful and knew instantly my preferences even before I told her. Thanks for the iPad. iPad dah penuh wedding inspiration photos hehehe.

And since I used a single bed for my room (konon yakin kahwin lambat lagi), me and Obe went scouting for my bed on Sunday. Eyeing for this one bed from SSF quite some time already. I'm not going to buy a whole bedroom set since I think I can still use the ones in my bedroom. So another yaey!

And also stool for our pelamin for engagement, which is DIY, found one from HomeLife. Almost almost almost buy it but I thought we should wait until I finalized on the concept first.

Hopefully the preparation goes well cause I don't have that time and energy to think all the way from Sabah! So must settle everything now because I think I will be back for the engagement one week before the event. Yikes! Tu pun belum minta permission supervisor :|

Lucky.

2011-10-31T23:49:00.004+08:00

We had a very tough week few days ago when one by one of our cats died. The pain of watching them died slowly, ughhh.

Luna died this morning. We got her admitted again after being discharged from another vet because well, she had saliva kept on dripping from her mouth, she couldn't breath, she was sneezing all day and she won't eat.

And when I called the clinic to check on Luna, they told me that she died this morning because of the virus. Had a small chat with the doctor and she told me she had FPV or Feline Panleukopenia Virus (awesome I can spell it correctly!).

So now most of our cats are still on antibiotic until they are better.

How many cats? Ahh well, TEN! Harrods, Krystal and Luna. And since all the mother died, their babies also died simultaneously.

All but one.

The lucky one.

The survivor.

The 5th generation. And the only one because we got them neutered already *sigh*

Lucelle, she was sleeping and she peed :| Had to changed twice tonight since she also pooped on my pants earlier.

Please please please still be the lucky one, Lucelle!

Oh FYI,my biological clock went haywire already. There's a baby to feed every two hours bebeh!

Flying home!

2011-10-26T16:58:00.001+08:00

I just cannot wait anymore.
I'm going back home in an hour!!

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Location:Jalan Lapangan Terbang (Lama),Kota Kinabalu,Malaysia

2011-10-25T22:57:00.003+08:00

I am just super duper mentally exhausted right now. I don't know what happened, everything seems to be out of place at the moment.

I am tired.

Please be strong...

Imagine our fear?

2011-10-24T22:51:00.002+08:00

I just couldn't stay still at the moment. almost most of our cats at home got sick. Yes, almost 17 of them. What sicken me more is, two cats died already.

Gosh.

I just couldn't face anymore death this week.

Last two weeks, Krystal has given birth to four babies.

Few days after, Harrods (Tutu's kid) died because of some kind of viral fever. And infected almost all of the cats.

Imagine our fear?

Last week, Luna has given birth to another 4 babies. But Luna was restless. Mainly because for the past few days before her due, she kept on breast-fed Krystal babies. And now she thought they were hers and so she got all stress and ignored her babies. Some of them still had the placenta attached and the next day, one of the babies died from strangling her own placenta.

Imagine our fear?

Then yesterday Krystal got sick. And today she died. Leaving her 4 babies, a week old.

Imagine our fear?

And mom told me Luna was sick too. And I couldn't stop praying please please please, do not take Luna...

Imagine our fear?

Ya Allah...

I feel helpless at the moment. My cousin just had a major operation here and I am thinking to help taking care of her since I am not that busy at the moment except for the on and off discussion with the supervisor.

But I just couldn't stop thinking of our cats.

I am worried sick.

Ya Allah, please protect our cats. Amin..

Anak Kampung?

2011-10-24T12:15:00.000+08:00

I have a confession to make.

I don't listen to Malay's songs that much. Let alone if its local(Sabah) radio. But I am tired of listening to all that RnB songs, fast beat and disco in radio so I always ended up listening to the local radio.

And suddenly I got hooked with this one song. If you're from Sabah you must have heard it. Mesti lah kan!

Apparently this song was quite a hit! Because even people from semenanjung know this song! They even translated it to Kelantan's dialect!

I just love their catchy beat and funny lyric! Something that you can hum for hours! Hahahahaha.

Oh this is another version. But I prefer the original one.

Now who is with me? Hihihihi.

Juggling between two.

2011-10-23T23:27:00.003+08:00

Well, some of you might know that I am actually planning for my engagement soon. I didn't tell everyone bluntly. I just share it with my close friends and will do the rest like a month before the engagement. There's nothing extravagant or big about it, I want it to be simple and sweet :)

So I won't tell you guys here when and when, because we have also decided on our wedding date also! For the nikah, Sabah's reception and bertandang. All I can say is, its going to be next year. Alhamdulillah. All I've been waiting for all this while. Because I don't believe in being in relationship too long with your boyfriend.

I don't know whether this blog will become a wedding blog as well. Maybe I can share some of the preparation. Or maybe not. Because I really don't wanna kill all the surprises! And, I don't want people to expect too much from our celebrations.

Deciding the date was the first obstacle. It was not easy because we have to consider a lot of things! Being a research student, I really don't know how my schedule would be next year. I just hope I will get some days off for my wedding. We had quite a number of arguments before finally decided that if God's will, InsyaAllah everything will be okay.

Budget is another thing. All this while, I have always told myself I only want a simple nikah at JB, then the groom's side then reception back in hometown. All I want is nikah! But Mom objected since Mama has a lot of relatives usually and since (I think) they have waited for our's turn for some time already. Oh c'mon. We've been in relationship for almost 5 years now and relatives keep on asking already. Fuh.

And juggling between study and wedding preparation? With no wages every month? Erkkkk! I still have a lot of reading so if I am not with the journals, you will find me browsing through wedding blogs.

Then I couldn't stop.

Then I have problem finishing reading my journals.

Then my supervisor would definitely kill me!

But right now I need to focus on the engagement first. I want it simple and chic. I don't want the typical pelamin. I don't want the usual canopy. I want it to be different. And I want my own creation dessert table.

Other than that? Thank god I have a sister who loves wedding so much! Hahahahaha.

Three people:

2011-10-20T11:09:00.003+08:00

Right now, I am having problem with this three types of people:

A girl who just got dumped by her boyfriend and decided to seek revenge and whatsnot by posting ridiculous updates on Fb. Oh c'mon. You'd got dumped! What else do you want? She's trying soooooooooo hard to show him that she has moved on by telling people about her 'invisible' current bf, about her fake assests, money etc. She who used to adorn hijab also, one day decided to straighten her hair and ditch the hijab. Not cool :| Its sicken me and all I have for her is a sympathy for being such a loser.
Someone who got mixed up by politics and said things without investigating it first. Sooooo bimbo!
A close friend who has an affair with a rich married man and before I knew about the affair she kept telling me on how she worked so hard day and night to prove that she can stand alone without the family. Gosh! That guy has been supporting her for quite some time now. You know what? I rather be poor than getting easy money from a guy!

I'm totally annoyed right now! Hish!

Bhangra over dinner..

2011-10-18T21:58:00.002+08:00

My calf hurts so much! So much until I almost walk like an 8 months pregnant ladies! Eh, sorry no offence! We had a family gathering last night. Some relatives from Taiwan came hence our family (the Toyongs) organized a small dinner at Mama's house.

It was supposed to be simple and cozy dinner but it turned out to be much complicated dinner (Mom asked the cousins to buy things few times from the shop), setting up the table even before 3pm, then the gardener decided to cut the grass so the wind blew the dirt all over the table, the Taiwanese people came and get so excited and the next thing I knew, I was already being dragged to the dance floor.

And I didn't know my family get so excited with Bhangra dance! Now my calf hurts :(

2011-10-13T11:01:00.001+08:00

I just love my life!

Hahahahahahahahahaha!

Rocky Rush!

2011-10-12T22:00:00.002+08:00

After two weeks of using my cousin's car (Thank you so much Kak Tity! How much I owed u on this sobs..) I can finally rest in peace moving around (and maybe going to Sandakan soon) in this town! Oh my how much I miss my car *big hug*

At first we wanted to ship it in a kontena, just like what Dad did when he brought this car back to JB. But after much deliberation especially on finding an agent and also the price, we opted for the much cheaper one, roro method. Which basically, without a kontena, just like in a ferry.

We did found an agent who shipped cars using kontena but the price they quoted almost 8k! And also under consideration, air freight. A friend from MAS Cargo quoted a price for me: RM20k++ Ok forget it.

I just wanna share my opinion and suggestion if you're going to ship your car.

If you have a lot of budget and need your car urgently, use air freight.
If you have a tight budget and you don't need it urgently, sea freight, RoRo.
If you have a lots of things to angkut together, e.g. furnitures, then go for kontena.
Look for RoRo ship yang masukkan kapal inside the deck. Inside tau bukan on the deck. Meaning that kereta die letak dalam perut kapal. Get it? It is much more safer and to prevent your brake disc berkarat because of air masin. We were lucky that we got one! When I saw the kapal, oh my god! Damn huge man! Gila gila punya besar sampai kau tengok pun mengigil lulut. They used this to transport new cars usually.
You can use kontena, but there's a risk. Because they put the kontena on the deck so when its get windy, big waves, the kontena boleh terbalik, and your car? Huhuhu.
When you use kontena, the agent can only open the kontena when the customer is there, with him. So you have to get into the port, which usually a hassle because there's a lot of procedures, then you have to follow for custom's checking which sometime took few hours, only then you can drive your car happily. With RoRo, all you need is to wait outside the port for your agent who will drive your car out of the port. Senang.

Now let me go and hug my baby again before I go to bed *big hug*

Only if...

2011-10-09T23:17:00.001+08:00

I just couldn't stop but adoring this dress. Jeez!

Clean, simple and chic. Just like what I want! Oh no, did I just talk about wedding and stuff? Hahaha.

Oh on a different note, Krystal just delivered 4 kittens today!! It was all cute and all because apparently both her and Luna was heavily pregnant and we didn't realized that until the last couple of weeks. Mom just isolated both of them this evening because Luna couldn't stop meow and the next thing she knew, Krystal was in labour! And Luna took care of her all the time. Oh sweet!!

Kittens for adoption, anyone?

Of three things..

2011-10-08T00:08:00.000+08:00

If you ask me few weeks back, there are three things that I want really bad.

1. A good telekung. High quality material, not fancy, grip perfectly on my face, and paling penting, bukan jarang!

Found one and love it! A bit pricey but hey, at least I can pray at ease. Oh from SitiKhadijah.

2. Tafsir. In english. I have one in Malay, been reading that since USM but God knows how much I have difficulty to understand the meaning behind it. Then I found an english version at home but that one is from 90's! So here, my walking tafsir. I can read anywhere. Before I goes to sleep, while waiting for Tity *cough* in the car!

3. A proposal *butterflies in my stomach*

Oh shaddap now! Just pray for us *chirps happily*

"I am a bird! I am a bird! I............."

*gedebush*

Raya Overdue (opss)

2011-10-07T22:22:00.005+08:00

You know what happened last raya?

I did celebrate my first day of raya with Obe! He came to surprise me and planned it out very well with Mommy. In fact, it was Mom who insisted on us to go back home as soon as possible since one of her 'colleagues' is coming!

We arrived home few minutes later and I just about to change my kurung when mom told me not to. So I went down and started to setting up the table. When I turned around, *gasp*!

I almost let go the plates on my hand eh.

He came with his siblings and cousins.

Then also during raya we went to visit Zulaikha who's due err this month? Ni kilang tak tahu bile tutup hahahaha.

And baby Hannah, Fadzilah's newborn!

And you can never missed Belle's open house every year. Because the whole family is really a one good host!

Anyway, am going to start my first class tomorrow. Oh nooooooooooooooooooo! And baru siap buat proposal tadi tengahari. Phewww!

Did I do anything wrong to you?

2011-09-28T22:57:00.000+08:00

*deep sigh*

2011-09-28T20:33:00.002+08:00

Since we're on long distance relationship now..

It ain't easy. Yeah..

But InsyaAllah, we will be ok. Amin :)

Du'a & Redha

2011-09-27T20:28:00.002+08:00

I've had my hectic weeks. And I am glad it was over. You see, everything were done at a very last minute (as usual ahah!) so I was quite deranged by the end of the day thinking of what was missing. Hence I need an organizer actually.

When I told everyone that I want to at least have a master, I thought it was all empty promises. You know, like when you were kid, "Dah besar nak jadi apa?", "Errrr doktor lah! Saya nak berbakti! Eh tak lah jadi cikgu. Nak jadi macam Cikgu Siti. Tapi polis pun boleh. Macam ayah *big grin*". Right?

But I didn't know it was actually a du'a.

"I need to have a Master, before I get married"

"I'd prefer working for a year before continuing my study, full time"

"Aku kahwin lamaaaaaaaaaaaaaa lagi"

Ok the last one Obe marah. He said tak baik, kan doa tu *silence*.

"I plan to further my Master oversea. Degree tak dapat so Master lah pergi"

"I nak pergi Australia!"

When we were busy with my sister's wedding, I was busy with my preparation to fly too. Quit my job, renew my passport. But I just felt something wasn't right. And I prayed.

Few days after the wedding I'd decided maybe it wasn't the right time for me to go. Of course it was the hardest decision I'd ever made. Mummy kept on coaxing me, asking whether I was sure with the decision. But I knew it was. I was heartbroken and devastated. Because all I had to do was to buy an airline ticket, and that's it.

But I know Allah Maha Mengetahui. And so I contented with what was destined for me.

And now saya berada di Sabah weeeeeee! And I can say that I will be here for a while or maybe forever *gulp* Rush will arrive in a couple of weeks and how much I miss my car already!

At the moment, I still have few things to be done. So bye!

Stop animal cruelty!

2011-09-22T00:26:00.000+08:00

We have 19 cats at home.

People who passed by our home would usually stop at the cats' house just to count how many are there. Kids would argue among themselves and the adults? They just kept on saying OMG!

So when Petknode's issue was brought up few weeks ago, I don't even had a gut to click and look at what they did to those cats.

Oris.

And people always thought we are sort of a cats shelter home. Stray cats were thrown just behind our house. Abandoned kittens were left around our compound. Once, we caught this little girl, she threw her kitten, well kinda like shove her kitten in between our gate grill and bait her with some Friskies.

Oris, Scotty, Haley.

Last week, my brother found a kitten in front of our house in a box. The box was left there for three days before abang finally checked what inside the box. To his horror, the kitten still had no fur and alive!

He brought the kitten inside, put him in a cleaner box and feed him.

Scotty aka Kecik.

And we continue feeding him using a syringe and Danish's formula milk until yesterday.

Kucing belum ada nama. Anyone?

I know the kitten needed a kitten's milk so I went to the store and bought one. RM13 for a bottle of no more than 100g. Went home and fed him straight away and I could sense that he loved it.

Four hours later I prepared another batch of milk and I was shocked when I found the kitten has died :( Just few minutes before I came because he hadn't reach rigor mortis stage.

Luna.

I know this is coming. I knew it! Sebab tu aku malas nak terlampau attached with kucing kucing ni. I cried silently when Abang buried him.

Tapi, look into a brighter side, if the kitten were to live, nobody would be home to feed him during the day after I'm gone. See, Allah s.w.t. knows the best, Subhanallah.

Tapi c'mon lah guys. Manusia ciptaan tuhan paling sempurna. Letak anak kucing belum tumbuh bulu kena hujan kena panas without his mom memang betul betul jahat. I really couldn't imagine someone dare to it.

But again, sedangkan anak sendiri pun sanggup dibuang, ape lagi anak kucing kan? Damn.

Here, Danish and his animal cruelty. Hahahaha. Kesian kucing tu!

Cerita Ramadhan...

2011-09-18T23:11:00.004+08:00

I only have few days left now and the days left are used wisely so that I will not miss anything out. But one problem, I know I have a major issue with procrastination. Plus with a very very low memory, I often forgot things that should be done in the first place. And by the time I realized it, I will get this massive headache from all the stress.

Obe suggest to use an organizer. So this lazy and forgetful me will be able to track down few important things, and reduce the percentage of me gobbling down Actifast everyday.

But its September! Should I buy a new organizer when there's only a quarter of days left for this year?

But I did have an organizer in USM. I jot down important notes, reminders, minutes meetings and ended up having at least 3 organizer by the end of the year. And only few pages were used in each of it.

OMG kenapa pelupa sangat ni?

Ok. Back to this post, hello raya dah habis baru nak letak gambar Ramadhan ke? Hehehe.

Just few photos from previous iftar with friends. I have a lot of good friends, Alhamdulillah :) I adore them so much, I love them so much!

Since Ellie was in her auntie's house in Mantin, me, Sofia and Iffah planned a potluck iftar at Putrajaya. The original plan was to break-fast at Dataran Putrajaya but it was raining heavily that evening so we drove around Putrajaya to find a good spot.

I brought spaghetti and trifle, Sop brought Kek Batik and nasi goreng, Iffah brought some kuih and drink whilst Ellie brought this scrumptious (and hot too!) baked potatoes and hot tea all the way from Mantin!

We had a lot of fun and since Sofia and Iffah were already expecting, everyone was ecstatic too see the baby bumps. The guys? As usual with their silly joke. You wanna know what? Go here: Video.

Next, another iftar with friends in JB. There were only five of us including Walid as most of the girls were not available on that day. Break-fast at Singgah Selalu before went to Bazaar JB to drop some cookies and window shopping and supper at Tutti. Ish. Makan Tutti jadi supper heh?

Linda.

Syima.

Belle.

Yes. I love them so much!

Just in case I am not able to come to your big day *cries*, you should know that I always love you guys! Sob sob sob!

2011-09-09T15:44:00.001+08:00

Ni namanya malas packing.

Bye!

Mo balik kampung :p

Istighfar...

2011-09-06T23:22:00.002+08:00

Lately, I realized that life is not about all fireworks and colourful. There will be times, many times that you fall and gain your strength back to continue along the pace. You don't want to be left behind. You don't want to be alone.

But each time you fall, how many times do you istighfar?

And how many times do you keep on questioning yourself, why me?

We learn. We fall. We rise. And we always forgot Him.

I know I am not pious compared to other. I know I have flaws in so many things. But I keep on learning. And I fall, Astaghfirullah. But I stand on my feet again.

We often forget, He knows everything. He knows the best. And He hears you.

"Fear not. Indeed I am with you. I hear and I see" (20:46)

So many things happened lately. But I know Allah knows the best. And I pray nothing but the best for me and my family.

Just so you know, I have 5 sets of cupcakes order tomorrow. My cupcakes didn't rose that well. And I really cannot sell them (I am my own quality officer yawww!). The second flavour on the other hand was bitter! Because I was out off self rising flour and need to improvised. Damn baking powder. And now I'd used all the solo cups :(

First thing tomorrow when the shop is open, solo cups. And I have to start all over again! Ya Allah rasa nak menangis sangat...

Weight Management

2011-09-04T23:43:00.003+08:00

Someone emailed me earlier today on tips on how to lose weight. I did replied her back but the email went to spam. I don't know what went wrong and I don't know if its a fake email, I hope not because she seems so real!

Anyway, since I couldn't send the email and also I wanna share the information with her, here, I just paste the email here lah! Hehe. Hope she reads it :)

Hello there ;) And selamat hari raya too (I assumed you celebrate it too :p ) Well, thank you for reading my blog. It is an honour actually to know that other people do read my blog hihi.

Yes, I was chubby! And compared to my other skinny siblings, sungguh stress! I was chubby and big (I think I have a big frame since primary school) since standard 6. So imagine all the frustration. Phew.

Calculating you BMI now, err 28.7 eh? Overweight but I don't really trust BMI, well, budak sports science memang tak pakai BMI haha. Ok, I will try the best I could to help you.

First thing first, love your body, love your curves. I know people told you zillionth time already but its a fact! Pasal if you don't love your body nanti you tend to crash diet lah, starving lah, makan pill lah whatsoever. So love your body first.

Next, you cannot lost weight that fast! Hehe sorry babe but actually if you lose more than 2kg a month, tu dah tak healthy. And you are tall! You are actually at the same height with me (mine 163 ok 2 cm different hehe) but the best weight you should be is around 55kg. I sekarang around 48 or 49, tak healthy I know tapi I don't know what to do pasal I macam trauma if makan banyak I tend to gain at the hips sampai jeans tak muat. Tapi I look like a jerangkung muka cengkung. Cet.

The best way to lose fat is through a cardiovascular exercise, or aerobic exercise. It uses fat to produce energy (with the presence of oxygen) but you need to exercise at low intensity and long duration. Because if we exercise at a high intensity e.g angkat dumbell or sprinting, you won't have the time to breathe and use oxygen so your body will use readily available energy in you muscles and blood or maybe they will use protein. Exercise at low intensity e.g jogging, badminton, aerobics your body will have sufficient time to produce energy from fat with the presence of oxygen.

So try to spend more time on jogging. Start with brisk walking for the first few days. Then slow jogging then when you are comfortable with your own pace, then maintain. Jangan rasa threaten with the joggers yang dah potong kita few times. Your body will adapt in a few months. But before that, buy a good jogging shoes! My suggestion is Aasics. I used Nike training before sampai haus tapak tercabut for 5 years, it was good but not really suitable for running. A good shoes will help you with your balance and reduce the risk of injuries.

Other option is badminton. Wow I love badminton actually compared to running! Pasal bdminton kita tak rasa penat sangat macam running tapi we burn more fat compared to running. Because I usually ran 2 miles for 15 to 20 minutes. Nak lari second round dah tak larat. So my exercise running aje lah terus dah pancit. Badminton, I can play for 2 hours! It was tiring but so worth it! But of course, you need to be good in badminton too. Kena ada teknik and all bukan bola tanggung every hit :p But its ok, I wasn't that good at first but I learned so much in each session.

If you hate outdoor activities, then go for aerobics! Most aerobics centre will conduct classes for 1 hour or maybe 1 1/2 hour. It has various intensity: beginner (low), intermediate (moderate) and advanced (high). Start with the beginner class first. Tapi I won't suggest aerobics if you don't have the groove. We tend to follow the instructor and tak nampak apa kita buat its actually tak betul. So the effort is not the same.

And how long should you exercise?

My advise would be no less than 30 minutes. Maximum 1 1/2 hour or 2 depending on your intensity. 30 minutes only if you jog. Other than that should be more. Tapi the pace need to be count too. If brisk walking maybe around one hour.

How many times a week?

The best to lose weight? 5 days! Hehe I know! Especially if you don't have that much time kan. Tapi cuba lah squeeze in :) 3 days a week is to maintain a healthy lifestyle so you really need 5 days. 7 days? I won't recommend you pasal you need a day to rest and also for the healing process. But seriously, you can get addicted to exercise tau :p

Then your diet. I takda lah nak cakap no junk food! Eat more fruits and vegie! No high sugar food! Drink plain water! Hehe. Because I didn't do that. I love desserts so I ate cakes and chocolates all the time, sometimes everyday! But I eat a lots of fruits and vegie. Tapi depends lah. Kita makan ikot apa yang ada kat rumah. Sometime my mom didn't cook any sayur at all T_T Just some points to be taken;

1. DO NOT SKIP MEALSSSSS! Like seriously, no skipping food! Food is good! Hunger no good! Haha. I eat my breakfast, I eat my lunch, I eat my tea-break snacks, I eat my dinner and I drank milo for supper.

2. But you need to reduce the amount you eat! Ini penting. Do not stuff all the food in your tummy sampai kenyang. Stop before you rasa kenyang then drink a lot of plain water. When you reduce the amount you eat, you will feel hungry during the next meal time. If you eat a lot, you will be full all day! And this is important too: if you don't skip meal and reduce the amount of food you take, you'll burn more. Because? Your metabolic rate has increase! Ok now that is what you need to lose weight. So food yang you makan, semua akan burn burn burn. Well not all lah tapi those yang tak burn you will burn it during the next exercise session. Get it?

3. Do not drink right after your meal. Tunggu at least 15 minutes. Or one hour. If you have too, then not too much. I think it works to reduce buncit bawah boobs. You know some people buncit diorang dari atas. Perasan tak? I think maybe because of the air but I don't know. I compared mine with my friends (who also love ice so much) :p

4. Do not eat too heavy in the evening aka your dinner.

Ok now as for what to eat, urm I don't have a proper meal plan pun tapi makan dengan besederhana. I mean jangan mewah sangat pasal yang mewah tu lah kaya lemak, carbohydrate and everything.Breakfast maybe you can try breads and milk/milo or maybe nasi goreng ke mee gorang ke or nasi lemak sometimes. Lunch as usual nasi campur tapi kurangkan nasi and lebihkan lauk especially sayur. Tea break maybe you can eat biscuits with plain water. Dinner you can eat cereals with milk or biscuits with hot milo. Tapi you can only tahan this for few weeks je then boring haha so be more creative. Eat salads, soup, sandwich. But your lunch biarlah nasi campur or whatever you used to because you need energy to exercise later.

Personally, you cannot relate me and your mission to lose weight :p Hehe simply because I did not start with a healthy way! Bukan bulimic or apa but I just got dumbed, then I live in Kelantan and cannot go with the food that much, then it was Ramadhan month, my roommate leaved me alone for berbuka most of the time, then I got busy with dance (Man, I danced a lot! Like a lottttttt! Hehe), I danced every night after Isya' until midnight, also had assignments due, represented my desa for various sports, then got stress hahaha, then my campus cafe memang tak bukak malam and my hostel was far from kedai so I malas carik makan I just ate whatever I had. But after a while I realized that I am not healthy so I started to make it healthy again, by maintaining my weight. But it keep on dropping! Must be my metabolic rate.

I was 55-58kg in 2nd year and drop to 52 in 3rd year and drop again until 50 in 4th year. All I did was watch my diet and continue exercising.

All I can say is, do GRADUALLY! Don't do drastically and lost so much because you'll gain weight if you stop exercise. And also those flabby skin. Ergh. If you notice flabby skin after you lost some weight, start do strength training e.g angkat dumbell, benchpress etc. That training is for toning but you need to burn those fat first kalau tak your body will get bigger if you directly do strength training.

I think thats all kot. Hope its help! I will email you later if I have anything to add ;) Feel free to ask me anything on tips etc! And good luck!

Love,

Shaleen

ps: kena upah ni email panjang gila! Hahahahaha

Belle's Engagement

2011-09-03T21:50:00.005+08:00

I have another post (the last actually before Ramadhan started) of a friend's engagement. Yes, the pretty gorgeous sweet hot english lecturer got engaged with her *cough* 'few months' boyfriend! Hahaha. Well, dah jodoh. Kalau sekejap, then sekejap aje lah jodoh tu datang :)

But Belle @ Balqis is really a one tough lady. Gosh, I couldn't imagine being in her shoes during those time, ah well, tak boleh bagitahu you guys here!

Anyways, Belle went to the same secondary school as me! Although we lived in two different areas, we rode the same bus to school just for a short time because I cannot tahan naik bus at 10.30am for an afternoon class. And, she was one of our dancers in school! So we always stayed back together, sama sama juling mata pasang manik at bengkung, then we would wait for this particular one bus; 140, because that was the only bus that pass through her house and mine. Oh my sangat rindu those days. Hihi.

I had a wedding in Pasir Gudang on that day so I was quite rushing to arrived on time at her house. Fetch Syima, arrived few minutes later and people were reciting Yassin at the hall. Rupanya the event start a bit later around 3.30pm. Phew!

Some of the hantaran:

The food was good! Luckily I was full kalau tak memang semua food aku makan. Nasi Turkey, Kek Lapis Johor (kan Belle?), OMG I just love coming to her house every year because of the food!

The engagement was simple, from the attire (which was borrowed from her auntie's nikah dress), the flow, the pelamin and even the future groom was not allowed to enter the house! Hahaha. But everything on that day was sweet and personal, and very intimate! Alhamdulillah..

Congratulation Belle! I am happy for you and couldn't wait for January! Alamak, hopefully dapat datang, hihi.

2011-08-31T23:57:00.004+08:00

Selamat Hari Raya.

Maaf Zahir Batin.

Semoga raya tahun depan lebih bermakna, Amin :(

First date.

2011-08-27T00:42:00.004+08:00

Supposedly date pertama kami.

Obe. *checked* (om nom nom nom!)

Good food. *checked*

And empty stomach. Ok obviously.

Kambing golek. Hish. *checked*

Nice ambience. *checked*

Adik manis. *checked*

Tapi still, date pertama tidak menjadi. Adoi.

Big news!

2011-08-22T01:45:00.004+08:00

My sister got married two months ago. And I felt sick just to think that I have to let go my sister one day.

I don't have to write in details about the wedding because she already did (beautifully, way better than me) in her's.

A day after the wedding they broke the news. They are going to Dubai for a few years since my brother in law got a job there :'( And I cried!I couldn't believe I shed some tears when no one else did but I really was crying!

I want my sister :(

Last week, we send Bux off at the airport.

Actually I was just checking on my sister, just to make sure she didn't made any scene at KLIA. Menanges meleleh air mata sampai banjir. Surprisingly, kakak tak menanges like what I thought she would be! But maybe that because she's going a bit later in a couple weeks and spend Raya with her husband million miles away from home.

Ok another sad face :(

Go, go away and leave me, Afi and Mummy this Raya. Because Abang will be in his in law's house this year. Oh plus Appy. Ok empat orang better than three.

But still, :(((

Ye lah ye lah. Nanti aku datang Dubai. Sponsor flight ticket puhleaseee!

2011-08-20T03:19:00.003+08:00

I cannot complain much. This is something that I choose. Something that I'm passion about. Something that I love.

My favourite mantra so far: I can do it. I can do it. I can do it.

And I keep reminding myself, this is rizq. I cannot say no. Hence I cannot stop praising to Allah, Alhamdulillah.

And I am so lucky I have my mom and Obe who are so understanding and helpful at the same time.

InsyaAllah, selagi mampu :)

Thank you guys!

2011-08-16T00:40:00.000+08:00

Dari dulu aku benci copycat.

Kalau dulu zaman hot stuff (hahahahahaha!!) aku tak kesah.

Tapi sekarang?

Tolong la aih...

I am nobody compared to anyone.

Get a life.

Stop 'copycat-ing' me.

I am nobody!

Kambing = Cholesterol!

2011-08-15T01:13:00.000+08:00

If there's one thing that my mom forgot to tell me growing up to be an almost perfect woman, that would be; the key to a man's heart is through his stomach! As cliche as it sounds, as absurd as it could be, I can't deny that it is indeed true!

Mom, you really need a guideline on this. Haha. Nah, because Daddy cooked better than Mommy, so its the other way round for her :p

Anyway, Obe is a really big fan of kambing. Like really a big big fan! He can eat mutton curry, mutton soup, or anything and don't even feel guilty with all the cholesterol he consumed in a jiffy. His favourite? Kambing golek, when I sympathize over the kambing kena golek, Obe would be all smiling over the counter waiting anxiously for his pieces to be ready.

When we were in Penang, we went to this mamak shop claimed to be Obe's favourite spot for mutton soup but sadly, it was nothing up to his expectation. He went back to KL half-hearted, he missed his mutton soup.

So I took the initiative. I remembered Dad cooked his version of mutton soup once, and I don't even remember how it looked like. Cis, should have written all his recipes! Then I improvised. I was hoping anything, any memories of Dad's mutton soup would come, but no it didn't.

Three hours later, Obe ate the soup full-hearted, no blinking, no pausing, no disturbance. It was the best mutton soup he ever had. The best thing about this soup was, its a cross between lamb stew and the usual mamak mutton soup. Tak berempah sangat and tak berlemak sangat.

So there I scored :D

Daddy, you're beaten by me! Hahaha.

Mutton Soup

1/2 cup oil
500g cubed mutton, fat removed
1 medium size carrot, diced
2 stalks of celery, diced
1 small packet rempah soup (I used Adabi)
2 tbsp rempah kurma
1 tbsp rempah rendang
1 bombay onion, diced
1 sup bunjut
2 inch cinnamon stick
2 star anise
1 tbsp coriander seeds, roughly punded
1 tbsp black peppercorn, roughly punded
3 inch ginger*
7 shallots*
1 bombay onion*
4 dried chillies, soaked in hot water and drained*
1 lemon grass, diketuk
Water
Salt

*blended
In a deep saucepan, heat up the oil and fry the cube muttons until half crisp. Removed and toss it in a paper towel.
Fry coriander seeds and black pepercorns until aromatic in the same pot as before. Pour in all the spices (sup bunjut, cinnamon sticks, star anise) and wait for a while until aromatic. Next, pour in all the blended ingredients.
Add in the lemon grass and bombay onion, wait for a while. Mix all the rempah together in a small bowl with about 3 tbsp of water. Add it in and wait until bau wangi a bit.
Pour about 3 cups of water, muttons, celery and carrots. Bring to boil, slow down the heat and let it simmer for an hour or two. Add salt.

There, good luck :)

ps: Few days after that, Obe asked for the same mutton soup again. My anwer? "Kahwin I dulu baru dapat. Lalalalalala!"

Iffah & Najhi's Wedding

2011-08-11T22:14:00.001+08:00

This post has been in my draft for quite sometime now. Initially, I wanted to make it a pretty intimate post, you know, when one of your close friend got married, leaving you with some single friends (sobs!), it really reminded you 'I should be next!' 'I should be next!'. Nah....

Then when the friend got pregnant for few weeks now and yet the pretty-intimate-post still was far from the blog's screen, the you'd know, you might just totally forgotten about it!

And so, here's for Iffah, whom got married to her soul-mate Najhi last June.

I drove from JB to Pontian with Nana and Nasyitah on 4th June for the solemnization together with her hantaran's cake as per order by Sofia (who is also pregnant anyway). We did arrived quite early and waited for Ellie who came 2 hours later. Hiks.

The nikah ceremony went smoothly and this time I managed to witnessed everything from A to Z for the first time. Nana and Ellie cried whilst me and Nasyi looked at each other and said 'Should we cry??'

We went back home quite late that night and when Nasyi's parents kept on calling her on the phone hihi.

Some of the hantaran.

The next day, me, Obe, Nana and Syima went out quite early just because we had 3 wedding invitations in three different districts that day. Went to Kluang for Pak Lah's first before and arrived at Iffah's around noon just in time before the groom's arrival.

Had a huge fight with Obe, because of him we missed the last wedding :( but who cares (I care anyway).

Obe and Najhi always with their inside jokes.

Pretty Iffah!

One thing you should know about Jie is................ he has a big family! Like really really big! Obe has 8 siblings and I thought wow! Jie has 11 siblings! And I almost fainted there!

To Iffah and Najhi, congratulations on the wedding (although lambat) and also for the pregnancy! Yaeyyy! Sorry no sobby post, pasal cerita dah basi hahahaha.

Ramadhan & Me

2011-08-04T23:50:00.003+08:00

There's just something about celebrating Ramadhan at home. Or maybe there's just something about staying here at our home in JB after Dad's passing. Its just every nook and crook just reminded me of him. Of every single chores that I did, I would take a few seconds to digest the memories.

When we were kids, Dad wasn't always here in JB. And so did Ramadhan (once during Raya!). So when he came back from Sabah to spend a few days with us, I remembered vividly, Daddy hold on to a strict principle parenting. All of us need to be there, at our dining table during sahur. No excuses eventhough if you had menses on that day. No one likes nasi campur early in the morning right after you woke up kan? So Mummy would usually prepared some soup so we could just sip everything on our plates. Then we had a cup of warm Milo right after that. Oh masa ni perut memang penuh rasa nak muntah kena habiskan Milo. Daddy would called all of us to the living hall and he would lead our niat puasa for that day before we hit the sack.

I don't remember when exactly did I start fasting but form1 pun still boleh ponteng-ponteng. But when Daddy was around, jangan harap nak half-day! No one dares to break-fasting dan dan tu before iftar.

And we don't eat rice and lauk-pauk during iftar. Its just that, Daddy always prepared a dinner a bit later after iftar.

Staying at home goyang kaki kat rumah (well not exactly goyang kaki except during my Harry Potter marathon or Star World session), selalu teringat Daddy. Back then after morning prayer, Mummy would wake me up to teman Daddy at his room while she went to work. When Dad wakes up, I would prepared him breakfast, let go the cats, clean the poops, clean the garage, sapu mop rumah, cooked some lunch, fed Daddy, start menyumpah ada kucing kencing bersepah (sumpah stress!), cuci baju, teman daddy, lipat baju and bla bla bla the cycle went on everyday.

I was quite surprised that nowadays I am not that rajin as before. Cleaning the cats' poops would take forever! Usually buat after Mummy suruh or bila bau dah kuat or bila kucing bising. I will only do laundries after a couple of days (membazir cuci baju sikit sangat konon hehe) and I didn't mop the house everyday! Sumpah penat. Cuba kau mop sini mau tak berpeluh sakan.

But anyway I hope I can get the rhythm back because if I didn't move a single muscle, I'm afraid instead of losing weight, I would gain few kilos this Ramadhan! Erkk...

Just something to share with you guys, I think this is the tranquil Ramadhan I have ever had! Seriously I am all smiling ear to ear everyday. Less complaints. Less lose temper all of sudden. Less arguing with Obe. Less less lesss lesssssss, which is good kan? Alhamdulillah hopefully this would last forever because I know nobody can stand a hot-temper hot-chick. Eh?

Happy Ramadhan guys :)

Kookies for sale!

2011-08-03T05:06:00.003+08:00

You know what, the first time I start baking it wasn't for others. It was for me. Because I had this enormous craving that sometime I had to bake, for myself.

Then when my father got sick, I had all the chance to test a new recipe as guests keep on coming and well, we had to serve something other than the famous 'caya' (milk tea).

I keep on baking as that was what made me sane for a moment.

But I do believe that I should bake for others and not just for myself and I shouldn't sell my cakes as that against my own principle, at first. But then after few times I had few *cough* shortage of money from buying all the baking goods that I decided to start selling them.

And nothing beats the satisfaction from all the customers! Alhamdulillah!

So for this raya, as usual, I will be taking order for my famous chocolate chip. I do take order from both in Klang Valley or JB so no worries lovelies :) I will just paste from my facebook album info here if I may (malas nak type lagi).

Hello Guys (and ladies *cough*)!

I will be selling my chocolate chip cookies as usual this year for Raya :) Limited to only two types of cookies:

1. Chocolate Chip Cookies - the basic chocolate chip cookies you may found but do not underestimate it!

2. M&M's Chocolate Chip Cookies - Kids loved it! And adults too!

Anyway, if I can find sometime to bake and upload the third cookies, InsyaAllah, you will have more choices to pick!

For the first batch order (Klang Valley area), order will be closed on 15th August 2011 and cookies can be collected either at Seri Kembangan (after working hours) or Menara Celcom, Jalan Semarak KL (during working hours) or maybe few area depending on our availability starting 21st August onwards.

For the second batch order (JB area), order will be closed on 20th August 2011 and cookies can be collected at Taman Rinting or nearby area depending on our availability starting 24th August 2011 onwards.

Payment must be made before the closing date. PM/SMS or email to kookies.order@gmail.com for more information or to order ;)

ps: Satisfaction guarantee! Sumpah tak tipu hihi.

Anyway, I also take order for Carrot Cake, Red Velvet Cake, Brownies and few other cakes for raya also. T&C applies as I will only bake the cake one day before raya to maintain its' quality. PM/SMS/Email for more info ;)

50 pcs

RM 27

50 pcs

RM 30

Hope to hear from you soon :) InsyaAllah, satisfaction guarantee!

Nasi Kukus Ayam Dara

2011-07-28T00:22:00.001+08:00

Me: Ayam dara tu apa?

Obe: Ayam yang belum kena tebuk tupai *scoop in rice into his mouth*

*silence*

Appy: Kahkahkahkahkahkahkahkah!!!!!!!

Why labeling people?

2011-07-27T01:12:00.004+08:00

Why do people have to label other people?

Its annoy me so much at the fact that people constantly labeling other people, judging from head to toe from what they wear, how they talk, how do they communicate, their manners, but most of all: it is from their appearance.

Why do people have to be so judgmental?

Why do you have to condemn other people?

Is it because insecurity? Or maybe you are just a pain the a** judging everyone around you.

By involving in the dance world has open my eyes. Being around all different sorts of people has taught me a lot. There are so many types of people around you. Different personalities. Different aura that you just have to blend in.

Being a male dancer, it doesn't mean that you must be gay.

Alas, if he is gay, it doesn't mean that he's going to f*** you anytime, anywhere.

Wearing a sleeveless is never a fashion disaster (for guys). And no, bukan 'mat kental' also. Its just everyone has their own way dressing, on which they are most comfortable with and it is not wrong!

And there is a vast difference between a soft-spoken guy and a gay-guy.

Stop judging people.

Stop talking bad about other people from their back.

Just stop.

Because everyone earns a respect from you, from how they've respected you. Take a breath and ponder, are you good enough to judge other people?

Ps: I have a gay friend who likes my straight guy-friend. And yet he didn't even take an inch to get a step closer to him (by asking his phone number etc) just because he has dignity and he respect all my friends. So you (yes you!), what did you do?

Post-Penang

2011-07-25T15:36:00.003+08:00

Was away to Penang last wekeend. It was tiring. Ingat dapat lah makan some Penang food just to fulfill the crave before Ramadhan but semua tak sempat (or tak larat). Oh c'mon, I don't travel up north for no reason!

But Alhamdulillah, my team won, again!

I was happy. And overwhelmed.

Because that would be my very last time with them :( It was sad when it was time to bid goodbyes. And I don't know if they understand but for the past one year and what I'd been through with through, I have nothing to say except I am so proud of them :)

They are my students and I will always pray for them.

Musim mengawan kot?

2011-07-14T23:59:00.004+08:00

Lagi gambar orang kahwin.

Orang sibuk tanye bile nak kahwin?

Obe suruh cakap: Ada rezeki kahwin lah nanti.....

Ok?

Pak Lah's Wedding, Dewan Kg. Melayu, Kluang

Deq Id's Wedding: Taman Mawar, JB

Awie & Hajar's Wedding: Kg. Skudai Kiri, JB

Syafiqah & Hamka's Engagement: Bandar Baru Uda, JB

Malas nak type lebih. Manjang orang kahwin and tunang fuhh!

Goodbye Kota Seriemas :(

2011-07-10T22:48:00.005+08:00

You know when people told you that taking care of a baby is nothing compared to moving to another house. It was super tiring!! I just left the boxes in the hall so everytime we had to pass through it, we just nudged in between the boxes.

And it took me two weeks to emptied it!

Of course there were endless BBMs to Obe with different sorts of whining in each of it.

Now, who says moving was fun again?

It was my sister's reception on the groom's side two days before the moving day. And all of our families including aunties stayed at my house so I couldn't start packing that soon. I just prayed to God hopefully we manage to pack everything before the movers came and we did, Alhamdulillah!

But the scary part was, although I stayed at Nilai for a year, I do had unbelievable too many things!

It's true but I am a domesticated goddess. Macam mak-mak version 25 years old. *sigh*

I do regret leaving Nilai because it was indeed a nice place to stay, especially at my previous neighbourhood. I cried a bit and took quite sometime to enjoy my last day there.

And I also left my plants there, because we couldn't afford to lift everything up to 19th floor.

Here at the new place, although everything was so convenient, with Jusco and Giant just few minutes away, I hate the fact that we got two parking lots at the 6th floor. It took us 3 minutes min just to go down. I hate the fact that we had to carry our rubbish bags all the way their garbage bins, at the ground floor. I hate the fact that I had no ground to start planting. I hate the fact that everytime I did grocery shopping or when I had so many things to carry at one time, I had to do two trips to the car. Not fun at all. Or sometime, I would leave few in the car and come and get it the next day. I hate the fact that I had no place to jog. OMG ini sumpah sedih because Seriemas had this beautiful trek for you to jog!

And I hate the fact that the house is so small but I have so many things we couldn't fit all in! *deep sigh*

But hey, at least when I leave the boys here alone for themselves, at least at least at least they can sweep the floor since it has a lesser sq ft.

Now, we'll see. And let's experimenting ;)

2011-07-05T01:50:00.002+08:00

Jakun sekejap.

Baru tawu boleh online guna Blackberry.

Like duhhhh!

Sorry senyap sedikit lately.

Busy berpindah rumah (and reminds me I haven't unpack my things yet for days!) and tiada internet disini buat sementara yeah.

2011-06-25T00:41:00.003+08:00

During my sister's reception, I was the emcee and also...

I sang!

Oh c'mon! I was freaking nervous gila gila! I didn't hafal the lirik hence I laughed a bit pasal ada salah lirik somewhere hihi. And I had this awesome cousins! OMG I love you guys sooooooo much! They actually helped me a lot! The clap rhythm was actually from their table! I couldn't stop smiling all along the song :)

There.

Scratched off emceeing an event and sing in front of the public when I reach puberty in my to do list!

2011-06-22T09:42:00.002+08:00

Hello I am backkkkkkkkk ! ;)

It was tiring! So much energy had been sucked up few days back that we had two massage sessions just to get our mojo back. But I am glad that everything went smoothly. Like no hiccups what so ever (as far as I know). My sister really did well being a planner on her wedding day *pats her back*!

I am back in Nilai and really need to start packing. We'll be leaving Nilai soon to Seri Kembangan. And the fact that it is a 19th floor apartment unit is not fun at all. No, not fun especially for someone who is an acrophobia.

I have it now!

2011-06-13T23:40:00.003+08:00

Remember I was telling you guys about this book?

Well guys what? Few days after that Obe came to my house with the book!

I know it wasn't that easy to get that book. You had to order it just to flip it through. So yes, you need to order; you won't find it on the shelves at any bookstores.

Because we went to every bookstores and couldn't find any. We even asked the assistant to checked in their system, no, they don't have that book.

I'd given up already and told Obe to forget it (hence the post!).

I flipped through every single pages of it and couldn't stop smiling all day!

But, it would be a perfect day if he came with a ring. Ahah :D

Making decision is hard. A-B-C is easy!

2011-06-11T01:30:00.003+08:00

Exactly one week to go, I know I can't wait. The whole family can't wait for the wedding. I am now back in JB hoping that I can do something like sorting out both of our store rooms, cleaning up the smelly and dirty godknowswhenwasthelasttimetheycleanedit cats house, change the curtains and at least, re-arrange the furniture so that it won't be that boring and empty-looking.

I also brought back all my baking utensils. No more baking in Nilai. But I did left my big oven there as Rush couldn't fit all in and obviously I couldn't angkat the oven alone! Even I had to scratch off my tree pots from my list. Cis.

And apart from that, I am also very scared of one thing. I don't know what to do it just left me stared at the laptop for a good 10 minutes, doing nothing. I just couldn't think of anything. And the fact that I am not good at making decision, with my decision-maker is now in Bandung, forgot to activate his roaming, I am left here again, all alone.

Think.

2011-06-06T01:35:00.001+08:00

*deep sigh*

2011-06-01T00:29:00.001+08:00

Mom: Since when do you have tummy??

Me: It has been there for so long already Mummy!

And no. Not funny at all T_T

Happy Mother's Day!

2011-05-29T20:47:00.002+08:00

I can never live without a mother on this world. Well of course that is a fact because obviously, we won't be here without mothers who go through hours of torturing labor process (yikes!). But what I am trying to say is, Mommy is like the world to me. Yes I am a Daddy's girl (because I love to spoilt by him and I think he felt guilty of abandoning me when I was a toddler), but Mommy is the one who will be there during my ups and downs, for 25 years!

I wasn't the most obedient child.

Story 1:

Mommy went to the hospital to fetch sister back home from her tonsil surgery. Just few minutes before she got back home, me and Afi decided to had few rides along our neighbourhood area. We were just about crossing this one big road when we saw one familiar car was approaching. And it was Mom's. We went back home and confronted Mom who had a hanger on one of her hand.

Story 2:

Mom always send us all to school since we live quite far from the town. It was my SPM year and although she had reminded me to focus on my study and stop involved in co curriculum activities, I did anyway and one day I lied to her that I had to stay back for some extra class when I actually involved in some dancing activities. I was caught lying to her and she was sooooooo mad. Like really really mad! The next morning she send me to school as usual. I had Add Math trial SPM examination on that day. I cried all the way from home to school (which usually took around 30 minutes) trying to find a way to expiate my guilt and before I step out of the car, I took out my hand to salam her but she looked away and asked me to go. Pergh. Boleh imagine macam mana gedebushnya hati? And I remembered my answer sheets were soaked with my tears only!

And look, 8 years later apa jadi kat anak dia? Hihi.

I remember those difficult days we had back then. And it made me realized Mom was a tough woman.

Mom was in Nilai on Mother's Day and she was in good mood that day. She even went jogging that morning! The siblings had this small plan to surprise her for a lunch treat but Mom insisted on having a lunch together to treat us for Mother's Day.

Yeah yeah she was all happy and in a good mood.

"Mommy! Happy Mother's day!!" *cheek kissing*

"Awwwww thank you! Lets go out! Mom's treat." *big grin*

We ended up in The Garden's an hour later.

Mom was happy that day cause she had a free meal that day!

We love you Mommy! We love you so much!

2011-05-24T01:21:00.002+08:00

I am going through a very very busy week ever. I don't know if you guys notice ke tak but I have started selling my cakes/cupcakes. So I have few orders this week and also this would be my last week working here so of course I need to bring something to the office.

At the moment, I am working on a Rainbow Cake. Err two actually. A 13inch cake, big enough hopefully to feed everyone at school.

But after 3 hours, I just cleaning up my baking pans from my 4th layers cake. I have another 8 layers to go.

Ok I really need some sleep now.

Till then!

2011-05-18T23:44:00.002+08:00

I was having my bad day today. No, I didn't fell down infront of the students. No, I didn't misplaced things and couldn't find it.

I entered my class today having a hard feeling. I kinda marah to the whole class for not listening to me and felt extremely guilty afterward.

And then I discovered two things which I shall not disclose it here. But all I can say is, how I wish Dad was here to comfort me.

Daddy was everything to me. He was the one who would listened to all my silly problems with friends (except boys), trouble with the studies or when I was caught in the crossfire or when I was having disagreements with the siblings. He would listened to all my whines and eventhough all he could say was "Be patient..." or maybe a long pause (I know he was trying to say something!), I would feel so much better after that.

And now I miss having someone to talk to. I miss my friends. I miss my family. I miss my dad...

Who is your favourite teacher?

2011-05-16T23:05:00.003+08:00

You know, those day when I was a student, be it at school, or matriculation or university, I'd never thought of appreciating the teachers for what they had done, for us.

In primary, Mom would usually helped us buy gifts for the teachers, she would wrap it they night before and we would give them to our favourite teachers. Because Mom told us too.

In secondary school, I didn't care much with the teachers, simply because I had none on my list, the list of my favourite teachers.

As I grew up, I realized one thing. Teachers and lecturers were educators. They were the one who shaped the future.

And I am one of them (at least until this month hehe). Eventhough the students drive me crazy most of the time,

but I know they didn't mean it.

Happy Teacher's Day to all.

You don't have to be a teacher.

You don't have to be a lecturer as a profession.

We are teachers after all.

A teacher to our own self.

2011-05-12T12:12:00.000+08:00

We are FOUR!!

Is it too much all I could ask for?

2011-05-11T00:28:00.002+08:00

Aku tahu hidup bukan senang. Aku tahu hidup ini perit. Bak kata orang; bukan senang jalan ke syurga. Tapi bukan ini yang aku pinta. Bukan ini yang aku harapkan.

Kalau lah hidup ini mudah sedikit. Kalau lah leher berlilit rantai emas, jari tersarung berlian tersusun, makanya itu semua harta dunia. Namun bukan itu yang aku mahu.

Is it too much all I could ask for?

Dugaan demi dugaan, memang aku bersabar. Because I am a strong believer of hikmah. Tapi sampai bila? Sedangkan pokok nyatuh lagi boleh tumbang dek ribut, apatah lagi diri ini yang baru sahaja mencecah 50kg semalam.

Its true I rarely express my emotions tapi perlu ke diberitahu setiap kali aku runsing?

Kadang tertanya diri sendiri, tidak cukup bersyukurkah aku sampai begini dugaan yang Kau beri?

Terdetik, dan aku kembali bersujud kepadaNya..

A perfect morning.

2011-05-09T23:08:00.005+08:00

You know what I love the most about waking up (super) early in the morning? Its the breakfast. I love breakfast so much that I can have mine at 3am in the morning. And it is never wrong to have your breakfast at 3am. Or 5am. Or 8am. Or 12pm!

My body seems to digest everything to the max during sleep so I always ended up with an empty and growling stomach in the morning.

Despite all this breakfast obsession, I know I can be assure of one thing: unless you've gotten me a buffet breakfast treat, I will never wakes up that early for breakfast. Like yesterday when Mom and Obe tried to made me rise at 7am in the morning just for a morning jog.

Who jog in the morning anyway?

Ok no offence teehee!

I just couldn't lift my butt from bed just to burn some fat. I can always dream of running on the treadmill and sweat for real on my bed just because my room has this perfect facing-the-sunrise-window with no air-conditioner installed.

When we were kids, we always had this once or twice a year trip to KL. We stayed most of the time at Dynasty Hotel because Dad was not that explorer type of person. And most of the time, I always loved their buffet breakfast.

Kakak on the hand hated breakfast so much that she would rather sleep or if Dad insisted on her to be there for breakfast, she came anyway, had a drink and a bowl of cereals and gone after 15 minutes.

And I would stayed as long as I could. Often being left behind. Then my sister would be mad. Because we always shared the same room and the room's key was with me.

But who can say no to breakfast buffet?

We went to Perak last week for Aimi's wedding on the groom side since we missed her's. Drove to Teluk Intan a day before and stayed at or friend's house then off to Bukit Merah early in the morning to treat ourselves for some breakfast buffet.

It wasn't all about the breakfast.

We took a nice long walk around the property afterwards. And kept telling ourselves that we didn't made a silly decision to be there in the first place.

It was not. I can assure you it wasn't.

Because Obe was there.

And that was all I could ask for. His wittiness.

No. That was a lie.

Because I had my scrub and milk bath afterward before the wedding :)

A victory!

2011-05-05T23:27:00.005+08:00

I know I know. I changed my template quite often now. Its just that I get so boring with all the templates *sigh* It has to be perfect, in describing me and the blog. As much as I like pink and all girly (you've seen my room right?), I really am pacing up a bit to the grown ups world now. Baby steps and now I am ditching things that shouldn't be all girly in the first place.

I just had my teeth removed today. There were two actually both on the right jaw. My dentist in JB had been bugging me with the extraction but I delayed as long as I could until one day, I can no longer tolerating with the pain.

I woke up at 8.30am, feeling heavy and sluggish, almost postponing the surgery, had a quick bath, did some laundry and drove off to the clinic around 9am. While waiting for my turn, I'd been calculating days before I could eat Obe's favourite ribs.

7 days.

Plus the trauma and phobia: 3 weeks.

Phew.

I also had this paranoia with dentist checking my teeth after I'd eaten something. So usually I would brush my teeth, twice or thrice then gargle for extra few seconds than the usual and I won't eat anything until I've met the dentist.

I came to the clinic with an empty stomach and boy, I should have eaten something because it was torturing not to be able to eat anything!

And the doctor was nice and gentle! My JB's dentist lagi brutal than him. I was lucky this time because the lower wisdom tooth had just began getting an infection and there was pus (euuuwwww) which is common.

"Nanah? Serius?"

"Haah. Nanah because there's an infection."

"Macam mana boleh ada nanah ek?"

"Nanah is common. Kalau takda nanah you takkan rasa sakit"

"Ouh"

You're not that hot anymore Shaleen. Hiks.

After the surgery, I can't feel anything on half of my face and the tongue. I stood up, walked to the restroom and put on some lipbalm. I don't want people to see me with one sided chubby cheek and cracked lips.

But still lipbalm do no justice because I went to Tesco afterward and got the stares from people. It must be the bloody saliva at the corner of my numbed lips.

I will get married to

2011-05-03T14:03:00.000+08:00

anyone who can buy me this book!

Like seriously!!

Gadis berbaju kurung biru....

2011-04-29T15:01:00.003+08:00

Gosh.

Sakit gigi gila. It has been few days now but today I think is the worst! Sampai tak boleh tutup jaw rapat. Sampai tak boleh pronounce 'S' and 'F'.

I wear baju kurung today which is not that peculiar now since I wear it almost everyday ever since all my baju dah rosak or lusuh. I knot my hair into a small bun, wear a blue ribbon headband with one small silver flower on it, clad on Mom's blue kurung which has labuci on it with my A-line black skirt.

Ended up almost 40 people said I am cute.

Including the girl at the McD drive-thru counter!

Tsk.

Kiut? Pakai baju kurung pun kiut ke?

Ok lah terima kasih saya kiut :) Haha.

Ok gtg. Nak pergi dentist. Gigi sangat severe!

Double birthday with a delayed one.

2011-04-25T23:46:00.006+08:00

My lecturer always told me that working life is much much much stressful compared to students' life. And I thought she lied to me. At that time I thought it would be nice to have paycheck by the end of the month. It would be cool to drive my own car. It would be good to have my own freedom, to be able to go out for a late night supper without imagining the furious lecturer with the assignments and datelines.

And again and again, I though she lied.

When I started working, for the first few months, I was alive.

And then I died (literally) few months after that.

And that was why I seldom blog. Because (like now) I always blogging dengan muka nak kena penampar tunjuk muka mengantuk depan laptop sorang sorang.

We have a workshop later this week and I had to punch about 80 tags. At the 76th tag, my punch broke it handle and then I realized I almost hurt my hand too.

The aftermath. I have a swollen thumb and numbness at the tip of it up until now. Great.

It was Obe birthday last week. But it was Afi's birthday last two months and still haven't blog about it hahahahaha.

This time I decided to baked him a peanut butter fudge cheesecake and a proper dinner with lasagna as the main entrée. It was my first time and the last time baking a peanut butter cheesecake because;

1. I am not a big fan of peanut butter.

2. It was too muak for us.

3. The combination of peanut butter cheesecake with lasagna (topped with extra cheese)?

4. I threw all of it after 3 slices (because I accidentally flip it down on the floor hahaha)

But this won't be my last time baking a lasagna!

It was meant to be a surprised birthday dinner. Afi insisted on having a simple celebration at home because of the exam and when I lit up the candles in the kitchen, he jolted out from his room.

"Ohhhhhh..... Cake aku ke??"

Cis.

But of course, he still had to wait for the lasagna.

Hungry but...

I took a long time to serve him. Remember the extra cheese part?

"Ok. I just have to wait..."

"Oh c'mon Shaleen. You can do better! Let me help you."

See? Easy kan? Hahaha.

And nobody eat anything later that night except for Afi who has tummy processing food 24/7.

For Obe birthday last Thursday, both of us took the day off and brought my car for the scheduled service which took almost half of the day to finish. We waited until 4pm, got the car, rushed to Kakak's for prayer then drove to Midvalley for his birthday dinner treat at Tony Roma's.

But what he didn't know was, I've planned something with his sister and she came along with her family and siblings.

He was shocked but happy dapat jumpa si comel Iqi (kesayangan Uncle ni).

We had a simple dinner, no singing, no cake, no gifts. Because he had all his loved ones around him.

Happy Birthday Obebe!

My favourite mantra;

2011-04-18T13:58:00.002+08:00

I should be happy.

I should be happy!

*cries*

2011-04-17T23:39:00.002+08:00

Sorry for keeping my blog private for a while ;)

I was so ecstatic editing my template one night and everything went haywire, I was sleepy and so I slept. So did the rest of the days when I was swamped with works. No fun.

Anyway tonight I decided to just use this template for a while until I figure out something else.

I am going to make it short for today, went to Ipoh with Mehrul to visit Dama. Finally the long waiting butt to butt sleepover. Thanks Dama & Mehrul!

Ok bye. Mengantuk gilak.

I love you of course :) Don't hate me because of the sudden blocked.

:(

2011-04-12T17:57:00.002+08:00

Bila hujan lebat turun and I am stuck in the office doing some works, one thing came into my mind;

habis lah baju bersih kering jadik lembab T_T tak sempat masukkan tadi.

But why did he carried that way?

2011-04-06T23:47:00.003+08:00

This morning, when I was on my way to work, I had to pass through this one area near my township, which is in the progress of upgrading the new landscape. They are planting new trees, new pavement for pedestrians and cyclist and rebuild the drains.

It is on the roadside, about 50m stretch from the road, up across until the palm trees.

And suddenly I saw a guy walking towards his motorcycle, 50m from the side of the road, with one hand holding what seem to be a thick wood (you know the one people used to pacak/build houses about 5cm lebar?) and the other hand *gasp*

No. That couldn't be.....

I had a second glimpse. This time much longer (which I almost hit the divider) until I turn 180 degrees sideways.

It was a cat!

Tawu tak yang people carry the cat by holding its' skin behind the neck tu? Yes. I saw him carry the cat, that way.

I don't know if its still alive ke tak. It didn't move. But it can be the cat's reflex. I'd seen it before with our cats so............ I felt sick afterward.

Well I was guessing:

He was the owner, the cat ran and he came to get him. But there were only palm trees there! No houses!! None at all! The nearest was like 1 km from that location!
He came to buried the cat who unfortunately died when he woke up this morning.
He was a maniac, cats killers *sick*

I just hope the cat is ok :(

Oh cats!

2011-04-04T21:14:00.002+08:00

Here's the thing.

We love cats.

We do love cats so much.

And I love cats too much.

There's just something about cats that are so serene as if they are the newborn infants. But of course, they did not behaving well all the time. Nasty urine smell, sprayed all over the furnitures and curtains, flying furs and hairball pukes, and the best: poops.

And to have 15 cats at home although can be fun, it can also be tiring.

But everytime I feel like a shit, when everything doesn't seem to be right, I will let them out from the cage and enjoying their silly acts.

Works all the time.

And then you would caught me chasing them all around the garden when it is time to lock them up.

Tutu has given birth to three cute (another kampung) kittens last Tuesday (29th March 2010). Although Mom was happy at first but later she realized that our cats population has increase and the cage will no longer fit them.

But let me introducing you to Mojo's kittens first :) a delayed post.

Bruno.

Batman mask.

Died when he was 3 months.

Luna.

Female.

Oris.

Male.

Looks exactly like Darren (his face).

Crystal.

Female.

Twin of Oris except Crystal has black nose.

Rhythm of Love

2011-03-30T15:59:00.000+08:00

This song has been playing (literally) in my head over and over again.

My biggest fan is.........

2011-03-30T00:33:00.002+08:00

No. Bukan Obe. Sekian terima kasih.

Maaf ye sayang. You're definitely beated by;

my neighbour's daugthers. Both of them.

Everytime I went back home, be it for lunch or after work, Aisyah would get hysterical, shouting at the window "Kakak! Kakak! Kakak!! Kakak dah balik!!". And her little sister which I don't remember her name, a toddler, around one year plus would follow her dashing to the door, begging their mom to open the door, to welcome me.

Awwww.

And Aisyah's favourite line was; "Kakak! Takde kek ke arini?"

Oh banyak cantik muka kau. Hehs. Joke.

Their grandma (which I just me today) told me that Aisyah cakap "Kakak Aisyah" means aku kakak dia. Hurm... Lemme think haha!

But the funniest thing was I also called their mom 'Kakak'. Takpe, berangan awet muda sekejap. Thank you Aisyah! Kurang sikit kedut muka 'kakak' eh nanti :)

Sunday: Strollers Day.

2011-03-22T22:33:00.004+08:00

I'd never thought hunting for a stroller can be this tiring. Last Sunday, both me and Obe went to scout a stroller for Danish. Weekend was supposed to be the day where we would woke up pretty late but since we don't have all day for us, we had to anyway.

I remembered this one shop in Bangsar Village that sells awesome strollers so we went there first. The first stroller that we tried was Bugaboo. And it was the best stroller so far that I have ever tried! But since it was way too much over-budget for Abang, we had to scout for another one.

So we went to Midvalley.

Here was where I finally found Obe's hidden talent (other than his dance grooves that has never evolved for the past four years!); Stroller's model!

And I did not asked him to pose! He just stood there everytime I was ready with my phone, ready to strike a pose.

But this one last stroller, Obe was busy fantasizing about another MacLaren. C'mon dear, MacLaren's car will make our wallet kempis every month. Haha.

We passed by Harvey Norman when we were on our way to Carrefour and I insisted on just checking on the Toshiba's laptop he was talking about. One sales guy came and he was mad with his boss so he gave us a much lower price for that laptop and we bought it, within a minute.

I never had a chance to think.

I never had a chance to bid goodbye to my old laptop.

But I do need to replace the old one anyway. It had served me well during my student's life up until now.

But sorry old lappy, I just need a laptop with a built-in webcam....

Hahahahaha. No lah. But I do think it captured a pretty bad quality picture. Adoi.

Mana tudung kau?

2011-03-15T15:40:00.001+08:00

Oh macam tu..

ps: hormones goes haywire. Remind me to do check up soon!

And one reason is enough for me..

2011-03-08T22:12:00.002+08:00

But I'd been staring at this empty page for a while now. Thinking and staring. And then after solat and some weekly facial routine (I am now waiting for my mask to dry!) maybe I can throw in few words, to amuse ~~you~~ me.

Maybe the main reason of me blogging lately was wrong in the first place.

Maybe, I don't know.

Maybe?

I remember vividly, I blog because this is the only way for me to channel every things out. This is my walking journal, or harddisk. This is where I can recall everything (well almost) that happened before. Because I am such a bimbo who forgets things easily. Things like whether I had my 3rd dose of Hep B vaccine or not. Or things like where did I get that nasty scratch on my car?

And so I blog again.

Because this is the only way for me to vent out my feelings. And thoughts. Thoughts that not even Obe could understand.

Just so you know (because the mask is almost dry now), I have submitted my resignation letter yesterday. It wasn't that surprise as most of the staffs knew I am going to leave anyway soon so I have decided to take that 2 months notice yesterday.

I don't know if its a good decision but I need to do something.

It is my Dad's dream to see me pursue my study somewhere but Malaysia. Alhamdulillah, I have gotten an admission to a university somewhere south and now I am looking for any loans or scholarships. Please do let me know if you know any. Because we are not that filthy rich family who can afford all of those.

But InsyaAllah, with God's will.

But let say I couldn't go because of financial reason, lets just hope Allah SWT has some good reasons for all of that :)

2011-03-08T01:16:00.001+08:00

Just give me a reason to blog.

2 months left baby.

2 months left...

Mom's belated Brithday

2011-02-28T01:10:00.005+08:00

Last weekend was the most productive weekend I ever had. The first weekend I had for this year, the first one I spent all day along sipping through the countless 3 in 1 Milo drink, packets of maggie and various types of fat and greasy food.

I baked hundreds of cookies last weekend, for my nephew's aqiqah this weekend. It didn't ended there. Just a few hours before the journey of hundreds cookies, I baked two different types of cake; assembled and frosting it, as a treat for my students who graduated this month.

I thought I can finally take a deep breath when I has finished my Sabah's post but boy, I was wrong! *sigh*

Two week after we got back to Semenanjung from Sabah, we held Dad's one year kenduri at home. It was Mom's birthday month and since me and Kakak wasn't there for her birthday (I 'bribe' Afi to buy a Baskin Robin's Cake and a bouquet of flowers and forced us to sing a happy birthday song on a conference call.

It was fun but before mom could thank us for the sweet melancholy voice, Afi hang up on us.

Good boy.

So we kind of kidnapped Mom the next day on Sunday(!) to KSL City Mall. Or something I don't remember it correctly, for lunch at Seoul Garden. The mall was packed with people, mainly because it was Sunday and CNY was approaching. We settled ourselves at the restaurant, each of us digging our own food...

...and Kakak came with the smallest slice of cake with a candle on it! Hehehe.

We sang her the birthday song all over again but this time we make sure it wasn't that loud and out of pitch or something.

And each of us managed to share bits of love of Mom's among ourselves.

The only thing about Seoul Garden apart from the super bloated and full tummy was; I had to make sure I scrub my body from top to bottom. I hate going out from a restaurant smelling food all over my body. I can pass out you know just by sniffing it. Seriously.

That was why when we got back to our home late in the evening, rushing packing our things to go back to Nilai (Kakak and Afi left earlier than us), I gave Obe this look that could almost kill him because he resisted to take a bathe before the journey. Like seriously? Seriously Obe? Not enough of suffocating me already?

But he did mandi.

"Nasib baik I mandi tadi kan?"

Tawuuuuuuuuuuu takpeeeeeee! Ingin pulak kau tak mandi! Haha.

ps: this post was created 4 days ago. Teeheee.

Part 7: KK and Labuan!

2011-02-26T23:36:00.004+08:00

I really need to finish the Sabah entries by today. Like really bad. I have so many delayed posts which I think I don't know if I were able to finish it :p

Okay. So after we got back to KK, we were all dead tired tapi sempat one more round RISK pasal addicted from that night. We were supposed to go to island hoping the next day with Uncle Len's family but since all went back to Keningau to look after Mama, we had nothing to do left other than food hunting!

Let's begin with Wan Wan!

We can never, never get bored of it. As usual my personal favourite: Tomyam! We went there again for lunch for the second time that week.

And of course, seafood!

I thought I have uploaded more pictures of the food, but well, maybe I forgot. You can see it from my Fb account for more pictures ;)

Me and Obe also took that chance to visit Cikgu Amal this time who lives in Labuan. We woke up early, Kak Tity drop us off at the jetty then we took the speed ferry to Labuan. It took about 3 hours journey, OMG! But thank God it wasn't as mabuk as Tioman's. Fuh.

There were only two trips back and fro to Labuan so we had no choice to take the morning and afternoon ferry. We were rushing macam apa je. Sampai rumah cikgu, we spent about 30 minutes there, had a quick lunch before her husband drove us back to jetty. And we were pretty late at this time. 5 minutes before schedule, phew. Luckily right after we sat in the ferry, ferry jalan.

Tapi sumpah we walked so fast and not even had a glimpse all the cheap chocolates. Cis.

Hi Danish Ifwad! Ok Danish jugak hehe but this one is one month older than our Danish.

When we reached KK, both of us mabuk so we had a proper lunch at Suria Sabah while waiting for Kak Tity.

And we fly back to KL the next day. Mom arrived with Afi that night.

Finally finally finally!

That's all dear, my posts on the last vacation to Sabah. I am hoping I can go there again anytime soon. C'mon cheap tickets!

Part 6: A day in Ranau

2011-02-26T16:15:00.001+08:00

When everyone was done with their breakfast, we packed our bags, cleaned the bungalow a bit and quickly rushed for a family photo. Too bad the clouds do no justice, we could barely see the mount at this time. It was getting windy but the sunrise made it bearable.

Kakak got sick at this time infected from viral fever from Bux. The virus spread so fast among the family members except me hehehehe.

When it was time for us to move on to our next destination, we bid goodbye to the dearly Mesilau and bungalow :(

All four pick-ups went down the hill to Perkasa Hotel at where we parked our two cars; the Kelisa and Vios.

But halfway, one of the pick-up got stuck. The aunties got panicked (hehe) but thank God, Abang Charlie who was driving that pick-up managed to climb the small hill after few attempts.

Our first destination before we get our car was Obe's favourite place. Hehe.

The cattle farm!

And since Uncle Len works with DESA company (they own the place), we get free milk! Yaey! And of course the happiest person was Obe! Oh, those who didn't know, Obe is a big fan or kambing.

Took some photos, were forced to say "Moooooooooooooo";

We went to Poring Hot Spring after we got our cars. Managed to climb the canopy walk, but it was not that thrill anymore. Maybe because I have grown up :( Hot spring pun tak sempat berendam dah kena panggil because everyone wanted to get back home to Keningau as soon as possible since Mama was admitted to the hospital.

Damn air kolam naik baru sampai ankle. Hahahahahaha. So me and Sarah just splash-splash air kat badan sambil gelak.

Oh for your information, the individual pools are always full. What you can do is book cepat2 with the person dalam kolam. Once they're finished cepat2 terjun!

Mom and Afi went back to Keningau whilst Kakak, Bux, Obe, me and Kak Tity drove back to KK.

Next:KK and Labuan!

Part 5: Good Morning Mesilau!

2011-02-22T22:46:00.006+08:00

I have to break this entry into two parts.

Since we slept late the night before and was freezing beneath the thin and cheap comforter, I couldn't even get the chance to watch the sunrise. To get a perfect shot of Mount Kinabalu, you must get up early before the clouds hides it away from your sight.

It was still dark when Mom woke me up.

"Shaleen, cantiknya kat luar! Bangun lah..."

"Ugghhhhhh......" *pulls comforter*

"It was the closest and biggest gunung you'd ever seen!"

"Hhmmmmmmmmmm...."

"Bagi camera. Mummy nak tangkap gambar"

*took the camera and pass it to her*

"Wait. Macam mana nak pakai? Show me."

Few minutes later she came back...

"Nah.. I don't know how to use it"

Tsk tsk mommmmmmm!

But she managed to capture this beautiful sunrise which all of us missed!

I woke up one hour later. Washed my face, brushed my teeth and quickly took my camera for some shots.

And yes, it was the biggest mountain I'd ever seen!

And that is Kundasang under that clouds.

We had some quick shots....

Before everyone was all up, clean and fresh and left us the only family tak mandi lagi. Hahaha. The generator was already being shut down this time so imagine lah we had to bathed in the icy water! OMG sumpah tak tahan!

The strong women behind our meals.

And breakfast time.

To be continue: A day in Ranau

This is not my love story...

2011-02-22T21:54:00.001+08:00

I don't have a great love story to share. Wait, maybe I do. But let me just keep it to myself on that one ;)

When I was in high school, I was never even once became this hot-to-look-for-in-school girl. I was a bit plump but not that too fat and had this massive pimples on my skin. I was active in dance and sometime sports. Yes, I was active in activities since school.

I did enjoyed going around places; be it for performances or competitions or seminars. It were the only places that I can secretly had a crush on boys since I'd seen boobs everywhere in school. Tsk girls school.

One day, me, Ellie, Sofia and Iffah went to this launching of a marathon together with our teacher. Only 4 were selected from each school (and we got it because of Sofia and Iffah hehe! And we loved skipping classes so much that we would try everything to just skip an hour) and thank god couple students from EC came too!

Ok those who tak tahu SIGS students and EC boys macam made in heaven. And so they said! Hahaha.

Back to story.

I was single at that time so this one boy was flirting with me. He was ok lah. A rugby player (kot), well built, and quite good looking (but bukan taste aku). I didn't gave him my phone number but he managed to get my number from his other friend who was flirting with Sofia.

And he called me every single day.

Until one day he told me he has a girlfriend.

What??

And the girlfriend went to the same school as me.

What???

And she was my friend.

What????

My pet sister's sister!

What???????!

Eversince then I tried as hard as possible not to keep in touch with him. But he begged me. He sang on the phone. With his guitar and all. He said he was going to leave her anyway, for me.

And eversince then, I couldn't even hear this song;

I would switch channels or cup my ears with my hands. I just couldn't hear this song anymore.

Cause he sang right into my ears every night. Jeez!

One day, I was tired with his endless calls so I told my pet sis. And she told her sister. The night I told her, she called me at 3am insisted on me checking my received call log to check whether that was the correct number of the boyfriend.

He didn't call me the next day.

And also the next day.

Up until now :)

And they broke up few days after that. I felt so guilty afterwards but hey, I don't want to mess around with someone's boyfriend ok.

But you know what even funnier? He became his ex girlfriend's bestfriend's boyfriend few years after that. Seriously?? But they broke up last year. Hahahahaha.

Ok now I sound so bad. Peace!

Cycle of life.

2011-02-21T14:48:00.003+08:00

Quoting what this one makcik told me last week regarding death during a brief meeting with her;

"You shall never be fear of death. It will come when it is time for you to die. Even when you think you're dying and what's left for you to live is as thin as one strand of hair."

She made me ponder for a while.

Grandma has been sick for sometime now after Uncle Mike's death. On and off she will be admitted to the hospital. Needles puncturing her thin skin (until the doctor said no since nothing left for her to prick), tube feeding and on oxygen support. On and off Mom had to fly to Sabah and burn multiple holes in her pocket. But Alhamdulillah, Mama is recovering now so far.

We have 15 cats at home last week. But yesterday only 14 left. And nobody told me anything. Because everytime they tried to break the news, I would shattered into pieces, trembling together with severe acute headache, blurry vision mainly because the eye tears won't stop pouring.

I am lucky that I lives miles away from home. So that I don't have to go through all the pain watching the cats dies.

It hurts me watching they died.

It haunts me day and night watching they died.

Bruno died yesterday. And I was in Kelantan. I'd been so busy lately. Only managed to be at home from 8pm onwards. And sometime up to midnight. The house chores were still the same. I still had to do laundry, folding it, cooked dinner and sorts. And so I am tired.

I'd also been thinking so much lately. About future: on marriage, study, work, money and family.

Talking about marriage, no I am not getting married anytime soon silly. Mom finally asked me the magic question when we had dinner together with Obe. A question that almost made my heart stop beating. It did actually. But only for a few seconds. Before I said, "Mom, never ever ask me that question again!". "But why??". "Well, others but YOU!".

So enough said.

R.I.P Bruno. So sad I didn't get the chance to introduce them yet to you guys!

Update on the garden and me!

2011-02-04T22:19:00.003+08:00

Remember I was being all green and organic few weeks ago? These are the plants that I planted;

Ok. My spring onion tree a bit cacat because it grows but I only used it once :p

Anyway, I know you guys are having fun with the 4 days holiday. Boo, mine is different. I have to work tomorrow and Sunday since the college's convocation day will be held on Monday. I am one of the committee :(

Obe is out of town. To Penang. Tity, Lana, Obey and Sheena are here for a holiday and they went to Universal Studio, Singapore just now! I haven't met them yet except for Kak Tity and Lana. But they'll be here tomorrow to catch the flight back (so convenient eh house in Nilai!) to Sabah.

And I spend both of these two days on baking.

I think I really need to check my blood glucose level!

Part 4:BBQ and Football Fever in 15 degrees Celcius!

2011-02-03T23:56:00.005+08:00

I don't know if its really 15 degrees celcius. I just assumed from the shivering, cluttering teeth all night.

After the sun goes down, we decided to do a BBQ about 1500m from sea level (again, I assumed. I googled and so I assumed). It can be the best idea when you stays close to do heat, but a bad idea when you smell badly of the smoke from head to toe. I rather have cyanosis than die from sniffing my body (remember I have a very sensitive nose?).

One thing you should about the homestay (or any other homestay in Mesilau), they rarely have power supply there. What they have usually are generators which can only be used up to 12 hours.

And some of the menu that night was: rice, two different types of vegies, chicken wings, fishes, sausages and lambs.

Yes. Grilled lambs. Obe's and Afi's favourite.

And usually, the first person who couldn't wait and grab a plate was;

Sabrina!

She has gained weight from the last time we met her. And so did her appetite!

And it was the night at where the final leg match between Indonesia and Malaysia was held. The guys of course, didn't want to miss it so they made their own mamak style football fever in the freezing night. Despite the TV was no more than 28inch (less I think), they had so much fun.

And the bf sangat over in this picture. Sudah sudah lah tu! Hahaha.

The grown ups gone ting tong already with their *cough* so the cousins gather around the small table for.....

RISK!

We had to paired up into a couple, mine was Appy.

And even Mom was forced to play with us! Guess who was her teammate? Obe! :D They lose by the way. And so did us. Obey (cousin) and Afi won!

When the watch strike 12am, we surprised Kak Tity with a cake! It was her birthday and one of the auntie from KK sneak in this cake for her into our room.

It was beautiful night. We had so much fun and couldn't get our hands off from RISK. But the best thing of all, we get to gather around our loved ones after so long.

No this is not the final post :p

To be continue. Next: A day in Ranau.

Like i care.

Are you a photographer?

The tales about RING(s)!

When will it stop?

Two years.

Typical?

Aint this cute?

So how does it started?

Random pictures

Lesson learnt.

Manja's Wedding

Turning a new leaf, a new year.

Easy peasy?

Update :)

I see red......... Danish!

My collection of pretty girls *sigh*

OMGucci!

Now tell me?

:)

Wedding preps?

Lucky.

Flying home!

Imagine our fear?

Anak Kampung?

Juggling between two.

Three people:

Bhangra over dinner..

Rocky Rush!

Only if...

Of three things..

Raya Overdue (opss)

Did I do anything wrong to you?

Du'a & Redha

Stop animal cruelty!

Cerita Ramadhan...

Istighfar...

Weight Management

Belle's Engagement

First date.

Big news!

Kambing = Cholesterol!

Iffah & Najhi's Wedding

Ramadhan & Me

Kookies for sale!

Nasi Kukus Ayam Dara

Why labeling people?

Post-Penang

Musim mengawan kot?

Goodbye Kota Seriemas :(

I have it now!

Making decision is hard. A-B-C is easy!

Happy Mother's Day!

Who is your favourite teacher?

Is it too much all I could ask for?

A perfect morning.

A victory!

I will get married to

Gadis berbaju kurung biru....

Double birthday with a delayed one.

My favourite mantra;

:(

But why did he carried that way?

Oh cats!

Rhythm of Love

My biggest fan is.........

Sunday: Strollers Day.

Mana tudung kau?

And one reason is enough for me..

Mom's belated Brithday

Part 7: KK and Labuan!

Part 6: A day in Ranau

Part 5: Good Morning Mesilau!

This is not my love story...

Cycle of life.

Update on the garden and me!

Part 4:BBQ and Football Fever in 15 degrees Celcius!

My collection of pretty girls sigh